Stories about divorce

Why not now?

Fifty, sixty or above? Widowed or divorced? The time has come for you to give up on your life, look after the kids and prepare for the end. More often than not, a person loses the tug of war between age and will. Marriage is a decision taken, or on occasion, even forced on you when you are young and outgoing and discovering the difference between what you have been and what you can be. So, what happens when, in either cases, the marriage comes to an end? What happens when the person you were once so in love with is ready ...

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Kahlil Jibran meets Rumi

I am Kahlil Jibran, a poet, born in Bsharri, Lebanon and buried in my beloved homeland. Despite lacking physical existence, my bonds with the earth have not been severed. Being a spirit, I can fly across space and glide around luminous stars; but, my spatial sojourns have not diminished my love for the beautiful earth, covered with gossamer clouds. Often, I zoom down to the earth and silently visit spiritual sites, immersing myself in the divine radiance. On a balmy spring afternoon, as I was daydreaming on crisp, cotton clouds, floating over Taurus Mountains, the sight of Mevlana Rumi’s cylindrical turquoise ...

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Aisam and Faha’s separation carnival: The blame lies with us

Pakistani tennis star Aisamul  Haq Qureshi and his wife Faha Akmal Makhdum decide to separate having failed to develop an understanding between each other over the course of their eight-month marriage. First thought: Aisam, the tennis dude, loves milk (no pun intended). Second thought: Eight months! Who the hell walks away from a marriage in just eight months and that too in Pakistan? Third thought: Something scandalous must have happened. Must find out what. I felt pretty ashamed at my personal train of thought when I first heard of Aisam and Faha’s separation, but once I went online to see what the media ...

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Why one should love arranged marriages

It is hard for every girl growing up in Pakistan to brave drawing-room meetings, aimed at deciding their fates for life. But one only finds the recipe for matrimonial bliss, after coming to terms with it. Arranged marriages may seem awry to some, but you only realise when you have undergone or seen cases in which love marriages don’t quite prove to be the best way out. Here are some of the reasons why I believe arranged marriages trump love marriages. Statistics have proven that the probability of a love marriage failing is higher than an arranged marriage. People who usually fall in ...

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Run Katie, run!

It hasn’t been a very happy birthday for A-list Hollywood actor Tom Cruise, aka Thomas Cruise Mapother IV, as he turned half a century in his Beverly Hills mansion while the rest of his country prepared for Fourth of July festivities. It’s not easy to maintain a straight face, even for an actor, when the world and it’s telephoto lenses are waiting to catch a glimpse of a wretched expression (after discovering one’s spouse has filed for divorce and sole legal custody of one’s beloved  and only biological child). And then there’s Katie, who’s become a worn-down shell of her previous Dawson’s ...

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Beware: Your knight in shining armour might be out to get you!

We’ve all been advised at some point in our lives to choose our company wisely. Never in time has it held more importance than today, when you can’t even trust your own blood. Javaid Choudhary’s column, some time ago, titled “Save your children” in the Daily Express makes for a chilling read in this regard as he meticulously outlines how certain gangs are operating in the country. They settle in posh areas, admit their children to a pristine private school and the next thing you know, your child has a new best friend that he can’t stop raving about. Soon enough, as this ...

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Minority rights: A tale of two divorces

It is the middle of the year 2004; two young married ladies, Parveen Amanual and Asia Tabassam, who reside in the same locality of Rahim Yar Khan, come to the court. They are both hard done by their husbands, and want to get a divorce. Their divorce cases were, thus, duly filed against their husbands. By the end of 2004, within a period of four months, Asia Tabassam was able to get her divorce, and she is now re-married living with her second husband and three kids. Parveen Amanual, however, did not have the same luck. It is 2011, ...

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“Death is better than divorce”

When I heard that Nariman*, my bubbly childhood friend, was back in town, I was overjoyed beyond belief. I looked forward to a time full of fun and laughter and doing every thing under the sun. When we were younger, I actually believed that sitting still caused Nariman physical pain, because she was always so excited. But three years after her wedding, she sits old and haggard, her eyes devoid of all laughter, her gait lacking spirit, and her voice like a mere rustle of dead leaves on parched mud. What led to the transition is not the fact that ...

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Violence against women: Where is justice when we need it?

The issue of violence against women in our country is, unfortunately, one that has existed for far too long. Many women still await justice against the brutalities that have made their lives miserable. Anwari Bibi, a resident of Ghotki and a mother of four children, was one of them. She was gang raped by her brother-in-law and his companions while pregnant. After her husband took custody of her children and divorced her, she came to Islamabad to knock at the doors of the self-proclaimed representatives of justice. She returned home not too long after, empty handed. Being a reporter, and more ...

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Making informed choices

Mark Steven Johnson, an American film writer and director, once said, “Everything you do in life, every choice you make, has a consequence.” Last week a woman filed a petition in court seeking divorce from an uneducated man to whom she was married by her parents when she was a young girl. The woman said that she had studied and become a teacher but her husband did not get any education. She submitted that she could not foresee a happy marriage with him since they were very different from each other. My first reaction after reading the news was to rejoice ...

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