Stories about divorce

Let’s give Shaista Wahidi a break

Shaista Wahidi, sometimes referred to as Dr Shaista or Shaista Lodhi is Sahir Lodhi’s sister. The brother-sister duo have a way of ruffling both the wrong feathers and the right ones; they can be called ‘famous’ or ‘infamous’. Shaista is one of Pakistani television’s most known faces. People have loved her and have been irritated by her simultaneously, but have not been able to ignore her. We have talked about her antics, her typical laughter in which she covers her face with her hand, her metamorphosis in how her face looks and have broken her down multiple times. One of the most ...

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Ask Sayeda: What are the grounds for divorce?

I’m from a pretty well to do segment of Pakistani society. Have been working for 10 years, and am on the brink of divorce. Being fairly spiritual, I wanted to know what is your opinion about what is too far in a marriage — what would be the grounds for divorce? I have lived with some minor physical fights that had more emotional trauma than physical; lived through ‘emotional’ affairs where my husband has been inappropriate with a woman online; and have also faced living in one room in my in-laws house because my husband does not financially support me, ...

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I was thrashed but not beaten: Never be afraid of divorce

I got married at a very young age. I was 17- years-old and had not even finished high school yet. I was married to a man who was 31 years old at the time, an MBA graduate from a university in the US. He belonged to an elite and very well to do family from Karachi and was also the only son. Marriage to me was all about jewellery, fun, laugh and play, but it didn’t take long for me to realise that although it was a new relationship it was definitely a very strange one. In the third month of ...

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Why should a marriage rest on solely the bride’s shoulders?

Recently, I came across a blog post on The Express Tribune which left me appalled. In this post the author gave some advice to a new bride. Let me clarify beforehand, I’m no expert in the marriage department, nor am I naive nor presumptuous enough to think I’ve got it all figured out. However, the advice that I wish to pen is of equality – fairness, plain and simple. You wouldn’t maintain a friendship if it were one-sided, would you? You wouldn’t make a deal or sign a contract in which you were being dealt a resolutely unfair hand, would you? So ...

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Advice to a new bride

Someone once told me, ‘Getting married is not the achievement; getting along together with each other after marriage is the real achievement.’ This statement repeatedly echoes in my mind as I observe the rising divorce rate in Pakistani society. Of course, this is becoming an issue in all societies around the world, but only a few are left as high and dry, both emotionally and financially as a Pakistani divorcee girl. When I go to a wedding, I often have an itching desire to have a chat with the bride before her nikkah ceremony and give her my two cents on her impending journey. Though, ...

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What makes a marriage tick?

Mess created by the construction of the Rapid Bus Transit System (RBTS) is testing the nerves of Lahorites these days. After braving several bumps on pot-holed roads, my car was stuck in a nightmarish traffic jam on Jail road. To vent my anger, I banged at the car’s steering, shouted loudly at the hawker selling coconut, and, then, mercifully, fixed my gaze at the horizon to empty myself of pent-up anger and frustration. The late autumn sun was low in the sky and kites were flying around it in concentric circles. The rhythmic flight of the birds, silhouetted against an orangish ...

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My misery, my struggle against myself

Her pace quickened- her water bottle dangling from her arms and her school bag bumped about her shoulders. She inhaled deeply as she started to get out of breath but she did not stop running. A few strands of her hair came loose from her pony tail and brushed against her cheek. She tucked them behind her ear, but she did not slow her pace. Finally, at the sight of her school, she heaved a sigh of relief that she would be safe for at least eight hours now. She made her way to her class, and buried her face in ...

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Ashen memories and the post divorce trauma

It was devastating and something I never believed would ever happen to me in my life. Yet, it occurred and left me in a paradigm of depression and frustration. Yes, I am someone who had to go through the painful moments of the divorce process. Since the process involved my 1.5-year-old child as well, it was all the more difficult an ordeal to handle. That was the time I lost all interest in life. I stopped going to work, barred myself from socialising and spent most of the time locked up in my room at home. In Pakistan, divorce is ...

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Mera Yaqeen: A massive letdown by Sarmad Khoosat

Sarmad Khoosat is among the most famous drama directors in our country today. He won back all those fans with Shehr-e-Zaat that he had lost thanks to the despicable Ashk. However, Mera Yaqeen ─  Sarmad’s recent offering to ARY Digital ─ wasn’t among the most awaited serials. Some insiders say that the makers had lost hope by the time they saw the end product, which is why it was never promoted the way every Sarmad Khoosat product, starring such big names, would be promoted. Nevertheless, it tells the story of a happy family, Asfand and Maha (played by Faisal Qureshi and Savera ...

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Why not now?

Fifty, sixty or above? Widowed or divorced? The time has come for you to give up on your life, look after the kids and prepare for the end. More often than not, a person loses the tug of war between age and will. Marriage is a decision taken, or on occasion, even forced on you when you are young and outgoing and discovering the difference between what you have been and what you can be. So, what happens when, in either cases, the marriage comes to an end? What happens when the person you were once so in love with is ready ...

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