Help! My boss hates me because I’m hot
Dear Miss Informed,
I have been working at an advertising agency for six months. They pay well and my colleagues are more or less cheerful, but I’ve been feeling unhappy lately.
The reason for this is that my boss is a slave driver. She makes me work much later than I am expected to and never appreciates anything I do. She takes out her personal frustrations on me, sends out emotional e-mails and never seems to be happy with anything I do.
Sometimes, I think she just does it because she’s jealous of me; I’m better looking, younger and have more friends at work than she does.
This is my dream job and I don’t want to quit but I can’t stand this anymore. I have tried talking to her but she will not listen. Should I grin and bear it or stand up for my self at the risk losing my job?
Depressed but dedicated
Dear depressed but dedicated,
Your boss sounds like a dragon. It can’t be easy to work for someone who ignores your commitment and only throws criticism your way. I am sorry that you are the object of her anger; it’s a bit of a sticky situation because low morale may affect your performance, which means more criticism and more work misery.
If this is the job you love than don’t let a moody co-worker frighten you off. Finding a career you love is not easy and there is no reason another person should push you away from a path that you deserve to be on. While the workplace is no place is for personal frustrations, the fact is that when dealing with people anywhere we must all be prepared for a few dragons.
Here are a few things you can do:
- Reflect on your performance: do you think your work might not be up to the mark? Maybe the problem is you, and not her.
- Chit chat: discuss your problem with a trusted colleague to find out if you are being singled out. Do others feel this way as well? If so, you know that this is your boss’ temperament and something you may have to accept.
- Talk to the HR department about your problem. I know you have communicated your feelings to her, but perhaps she will take the complaint more seriously if HR sits her down and says that the issue is getting out of hand. It might make her realise that she can’t get away with being nasty to you and should re-assess her attitude.
- If that doesn’t work, weigh the pros and cons of sticking it out at your current workplace. Sure, the pay is good and your colleagues are nice. But do the constant demoralising quips affect your productivity?
- Most importantly – get over yourself! Not everything is about looks and popularity. You may be younger than her, but she probably has tonnes of experience that has helped her reach where she is. Focus on your career rather than your boss, and remember that at the end of the day you both want the same thing: increased productivity and a happy work place.
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