What if Brangelina were a Pakistani couple?

Published: September 24, 2016

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie posed for photographers at the premiere of the film "Maleficent" in London. PHOTO: AFP

Just heard the horrendous news that you two have decided to split up. I would really like to sympathise with you but got tied up with pulling in all my winning bets that your marriage wouldn’t last even this long.

Hate to say it, but it would have been better if you two hadn’t gotten married at all. I mean, you lasted longer without marriage and while rounding up six kids. So really can’t figure out why you had to take the hassle of getting married in the first place.

Don’t take this personally, but the western society at large seems to have an obsession to get divorced if they are married. So the best way to avoid this compulsive behaviour is not to get married in the first place, as demonstrated by your example. Since everyone is jumping on the melodramatic bandwagon provided by the news of your splitting up, there was hardly any reason why I shouldn’t be putting in my two cents either.

So I am.

I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t admit that even the people in my own country are catching up to the trend. Since they have the tendency to follow all the trends of the west, they haven’t left the relationship department unaltered either. Regretfully, dating is now as widespread here as polio used to be. So is the rebellion of girls and boys against the desires of the family to get married to whomever they wish.

However, even after all this fuss and feathers and hullaballoo, the result in 80% of the cases in Pakistan is a divorce. Yes, it is a sad situation but we have gotten, as with other negative trends, quite comfortably inured to it.

Angelina, I understand that you and Brad are asking to be left alone through this ‘challenging’ time, but let me assure you, that will not happen. So I wouldn’t count on it if I were you. Thanks to tens of outlets on social media, the human mind today thrives on sensationalism. Whether it is Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or what-not, everyone’s mind is ravenous for an instant new ‘bang’ for the senses every few seconds.