10 types of people you’re bound to come across on Bakra Eid

Published: September 27, 2015
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For a good majority, this Eid is all about food, meat and barbeque parties.

What does Eidul Azha stand for? What does it signify? While the politically correct answer to it would be “the spirit of sacrifice”, we all know that’s not true. For a good majority, this Eid is all about food, meat and barbeque parties – and I am part of that majority, staying true to the foodie that I am.

However, foodies aren’t the only sort of people you come across this Eid. The range of characters one bumps into is staggering, and here are the 10 types of people we usually come across on Bari Eid.

1. The annoying kids

Their only aim in life is to instigate the camel/cow/sheep/goat to escape their leash and runaway, while they run after the animal chanting,

Gaye bhaag gayii!!

(The cow has run away)

lol animated GIF

2. The neighbourhood uncle

He likes to keep a track of who got which animal for what price, and secretly judges them for buying an overpriced animal.

3. The uncle who judges such people out-loud

He makes sure everyone knows how inept they were in choosing the animal – because hey, it’s all about the money, not the spirit of sacrifice, right?

4. The random gawking strangers

They simply like to park their cars/motorbikes in front of your house and stare at your animals. The best part is, they go away as soon as they realise that you have spotted them “in the act”.

5. The boasting 20-somethings

These teenagers/young adults/20-somethings who love to boast about how big or strong or fat their animal is, and how they love them dearly – and two days later, would eat them without an inch of guilt.

6. The mohalay ki aunties (neighbourhood aunties) 

They make it a point to come down to check which goat/cow is theirs and then end up reprimanding their husbands for their bad choices.

7. The multiple kinds of butchers on Eid day.

Somehow, the number of butchers in the city increase tenfold during Eid, as we find electricians, carpenters, mechanics, sweepers, domestic helps, street vendors, and every other person suddenly turning into butchers. Needless to say, there is a lot of cussing and cursing while they work, since they don’t know jack about cutting meat.

8. The angry uncles versus the butchers

These uncles are out for the butchers’ blood for ruining their oh-so-expensive animals and cutting the meat all wrong.

9. The annoying eidi children

They ask for eidi even on this Eid, and then give you threatening looks once you hand them a packet of meat.

10. The ‘white meat or no meat people’

These people still insist on having chicken meat on Eid day.

Did they not get the memo?

No other meat for a month now!

While food is definitely a component, this Eid is also about sharing – not just meat, but love, happiness, smiles, and moments. So go ahead and have a blast with your loved ones this Eid, and all the above-mentioned characters.

Eid mubarak everyone!

Faiq Lodhi

Faiq Lodhi

A journalism grad and news-buff, his interests include current affairs, arts, literature and social work. He tweets as @FaiqLodhi (twitter.com/FaiqLodhi)

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