The Why Chromosome

Published: November 25, 2014

You should not stare as she walks past, or call her as a cat; Regardless of how she’s dressed, or if she’s thin or fat. PHOTO: REUTERS

When speaking to a friend of mine on how to treat a lady,

I was fairly shocked to find that he hadn’t a clue, really. 

There seems to be confusion – a dearth of clear ground rules.

When it comes to women, here’s what you should and shouldn’t do.


You should not stare as she walks past, or call her as a cat;

Regardless of how she’s dressed, or if she’s thin or fat.

Do not undress them with your eyes. Bite your cheap retorts.

It’s really no business of yours, if she’s wearing shorts.

“She should have worn more modest clothes to avoid catcalls.”

Instead, perhaps the men should try to not harass at all.


Who are you to decide the treatment they deserve?

Or if they’re worthy of respect? You really have some nerve.

Their bodies are not yours to ogle, keep your gaze averted.

Keep your thoughts to yourself, doubly so if perverted.

Lusting’s under your control, as are your desires.

Overcome that impulse, it’s what decency requires.


You should not rape a woman, for the crimes done by her kin.

Or if she marries out of choice, free will is not a sin.

You should not rape a woman, for dancing in the rain.

Or because you somehow think that she has brought you shame.

You should not rape them as revenge; you should not rape them as a friend.

You should not rape them as a spouse; nor in a house, or thereabouts;

Nor to act superior – you should not rape them, period.

Not on a bus, nor by a tree; oh Rape-y men, just leave them be!


On the topic of violence, do not hit them either.

Just imagine how you’d feel if your mum was the receiver.

You should not strike her out of spite, or if she’s caused you angst.

Or for clapping at a wedding, or if you don’t like her pants.


I’ve often heard culture is the people’s reflection.

If that’s so, then how come nobody’s asked this question:

How do people use religion to justify their acts?

The Quranic text that I have read does not support those facts.

Islam was once the pinnacle of granting women rights,

How did we forfeit that title with nary a fight?


You should not blame the victim, claim she deserved her fate.

Unless you’re with the CII; since they think that’s okay.

Because it’s common knowledge – an X-chromosome is haram.

And having one naturally precludes you from Islam.

So this morning, take a moment, be honest with yourself.

How can you become an ally? The world needs your help.


The next time she imparts your temper, maybe stay your hand?

Not catcalling or staring doesn’t make you a lesser man

So treat a woman with respect this November 25th.

Then repeat that every day, for as long as you live.


Hamza Hayauddin

A poet, doodler, dreamer, rugger.

The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of The Express Tribune.

More by this writer

  • Sane

    The writer seems to be a dreamer only.Recommend

  • Maximus Decimus Meridius

    good. I liked it. I see a person below me has not commented positively. I dont know why. Poetry is a persons feelings. He can say whatever he wants.Recommend

  • Parvez


  • Sabeen

    Simple and Amazing!Recommend

  • Le Khan Hammad

    Simply Wow…Recommend

  • Me right here

    When we have to ”tell” the world about how to treat women, this is where we know, my friend, that humanity has FAILED.Recommend

  • Awilda Perez


  • Moiz Omar

    Most of this should be common sense.Recommend

  • Nazar

    Now, who on earth would possibly rape his spouse? The poet has shown if rape is the ultimate social deviance the women face!Recommend

  • aliza

    This is one bold and awesome post. We must encourage such writers. Bravo! Recommend

  • Sadaf

    Absolutely beautiful!! Wonderful, really! #RESPECT If only more people had that much sense in them or atleast, had a human inside them.

  • Hameedullah

    Ever heard of marital rape/spousal rape? I guess not.Recommend

  • Syeda Ali

    V.well written! God bless youRecommend

  • Syeda Ali

    People in this part of world rape their wives quite “casually”. Open your eyes & look around. Read the poem with an open mind. He has mentioned many problems women face but undoubtedly rape is “bad enough” to be condemned enough!Recommend

  • Mohammad

    Good Effort! Fully agree to more than 90% of the content since, unfortunately and ironically, the condition of women in our society is very deplorable and something which needs to be considered and improved on a war footing, however, women should also try to play their part by being responsible enough to not to provide a second hand for a clap and it includes an endless list of things e.g not reporting an abuse, letting men exploit just due to fear etc. Moreover, women should also respect the cultural aspects of the society they live in and should not always consider every issue as a rebellion. A man harassing, staring or catcalling a woman can never ever make the dressing etc of that women an argument to justify his disgusting act and the woman on the other hand should also respect the societal norms, culture and religious values of the people in that particular society. In lieu of Pakistan, i don’t buy the idea of women in shorts as mentioned in the poem but again this is no reason for a male to cat call or harass.Recommend

  • Samar

    This is reallyyyy GOOD!Recommend

  • Samar

    This is reallyyyy GOOD!Recommend