Do you have a Sarah in your house?

Published: July 9, 2014
SHARES
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In the agonising, humid summer of Karachi, Sarah had to seek permission from her mother-in-law even if she wanted to turn on the air conditioner in her bedroom, which she was often denied. PHOTO: FILE

Whenever I see her, her eyes haunt me. The sadness in them is unspeakable and the horrors of her life, incomprehensible. She is young and beautiful yet her heart yearns for a minute of peace and happiness. She is Sarah*, a married girl who lives with her in-laws.

Sarah married into a family of four sisters where her husband was the only son.

The torture began almost immediately.

Her three unmarried sisters-in-law cannot stand the very sight of her. They never speak a kind word to her, and always address her with stern and blank expressions on their faces. The very faces that smile at everyone else freeze at the sight of Sarah. When the family attends marriages and other events, Sarah is left behind. Although she is expected to be present before their eyes at all times (lest she retreats to her bedroom to rest), she is not allowed to participate in conversations. When she enters the room, the conversation halts and all eyes receive her with disdain.

One particular evening, some guests were over, and Sarah’s mother-in-law and sisters-in-law ridiculed her cooking in front of them, leaving her red faced.

But how could she ever confront them for the insult? How dare she?

Stern eyes watch Sarah’s every move. She is not allowed to stay in her bedroom, go out alone with her husband or visit her parents. At meal times, her plate is examined for the amount of food on it.

A few months into the wedding, Sarah became pregnant and this gave her immense relief, for she felt that perhaps an innocent new life would bring forth kindness and acceptance from her in-laws. But things seemed only to get worse. She was not shown any mercy in the first gruelling months. Her immense nausea was regarded as irritating, “a drama” and ignored.

She had to continue performing the household chores. Although a maid came in the mornings to clean the house, she was instructed not to clean Sarah’s room. In the agonising, humid summer of Karachi, Sarah had to seek permission from her mother-in-law even if she wanted to turn on the air conditioner in her bedroom, which she was often denied.

The months passed and one day Sarah felt an excruciating pain in her abdomen. She mustered the courage to inform her mother-in-law of the pain, only to be brushed off. By evening the pain had increased and she observed bleeding. Her husband took her to a clinic nearby where, to their horror, they were informed that Sarah had miscarried the baby.

After this incident, Sarah was sent to her mother’s house for a few months because the in-laws feared the neighbourhood would associate the miscarriage with their openly torturous behaviour towards her. When things hushed down, Sarah returned and so did the cruelty from her in-laws, with a vengeance.

Sarah comes from a lower middle class family. She must make the marriage work. She must suffer, day in and day out, by the very people who are supposed to be her ‘new’ family – people who are unbelievably nice with everyone else, except with their own brother’s wife.

Sarah’s is a true story.

My question to you all is this: when we love our own daughters with our heart and soul, how can we hate another’s daughter to such an extreme? Such cruel behaviour exists in many households across the country, more so with females hailing from weaker families.

When and how will things change?

And before you nod your heads in agreement or shake them in horror, look around yourself.

Is there a Sarah in your house as well?

*Names have been changed to protect identities

Ayesha Pervez

Ayesha Pervez

Currently pursuing TESL in Canada, Ayesha Pervez is an English Literature graduate from the University of Karachi who has completed courses in short-fiction and journalism from Harvard University.

The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of The Express Tribune.

  • Kalakawa

    Your write like a good o levels student. Just imagine how good you’ll be when you grow up. Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Haha thank you for thinking that Im young enough to be an O levels student :) But seriously, how about we focus on the message I’m trying to give here … that we treat our daughters-in-law nicely? :)Recommend

  • Farzan
  • Visibly

    This is psychological torture. Did the author show that she found such behaviour unacceptable? What about showing the family that she likes Sarah and her cooking etc? So what do you all, not only the author, do, when you witness such behaviour?Recommend

  • Muhammad Fahad Rafique

    It is true to an extent that I can say there are a lot many Sarahs in our economy. The mentality of people can never change in our sub continent. This Sarah might grow up to show the same attitude to the next one coming to her house and the life will continue. It has to be stopped at some level and the time is now. Recommend

  • Muhammad Fahad Rafique

    It is true to an extent that I can say there are a lot many Sarahs in our economy. The mentality of people can never change in our sub continent. This Sarah might grow up to show the same attitude to the next one coming to her house and the life will continue. It has to be stopped at some level and the time is now. Recommend

  • Muhammad Fahad Rafique

    It is true to an extent that I can say there are a lot many Sarahs in our economy. The mentality of people can never change in our sub continent. This Sarah might grow up to show the same attitude to the next one coming to her house and the life will continue. It has to be stopped at some level and the time is now. Recommend

  • ronnie

    you are absolutely right..i can relate to this 100%.. for 2 years i dealt with my mother inlaws abuse until i found out i was pregnant with my first daughter. i put my foot down and she made my life hell and still is trying to but because i know that she cant do anything, she has no rights.. im fortunate to live in england.. i know how it is in pakistan it happened to my own mother. daughter inlaws need to put their foot down and so do their husbands, if the husband cant be a man, she needs to be a women and leave.Recommend

  • Nida Shahzeb

    This disgusting behavior goes unchecked because these people know they will never be held accountable. As far as I know a domestic violence bill has been passed only in Sindh and the Baluchistan assembly. Punjab remains indifferent and ignorant, A province where I am sure a majority of these obnoxious acts take place. Great post!Recommend

  • Jehanzeb Mahar

    This is what happens when people marry off their sons and daughters in families much above than themselves economically, out of greed. One should always look for people from roughly same economic background Recommend

  • Munazzah

    This is a very sad but unfortunately true depiction of so many huseholds around us,the question asked by the writer is brilliant,if we love our own daughters so much how can we torture someone else’s ?excellent piece of workRecommend

  • SWAB

    I just can’t imagine how these kind of rats are living in the society…. I am a son, a husband and a brother and my life is heaven…. And I can positively say that my wife’s has the same views as well….. These kinda ppl should be openly exposed in public… I pity these ppl…. If this is really a true case then the author should really reveal the identity of these in human numbskulls!Recommend

  • J.P Sharma

    It is really shocking. It is perhaps a curse rto be a girl that too in a poor home. We are not less than beasts in treating girls in all forms specially daughters in law.But there are lots of homes where daughters in law are treated at par with their daughters.But that doesn’t become a story. Recommend

  • Parvez

    Nice subject……..something that must be quite common just about everywhere. I feel the husband plays an important part here…….but the ‘ mama boy ‘ syndrome, especially in our society is pretty well entrenched and needs changing. Saying this today is easy for me because I can look back……but forty years ago, I don’t know.Recommend

  • Tinu

    A very good thought provoking write up and it helps a society to think what is right and wrong. Keep it up and more such articles be published.Recommend

  • Secular

    ‘go out alone with her husband’

    How a person is alone when he has a companion, husband ?????Recommend

  • Secular

    you have pointed out the problem, now write another article to give its solution..
    :)Recommend

  • Iftikhar Ali

    Another evidence that the biggest enemy of a women is women. Insanity prevails.Recommend

  • Fatima Zahid

    I really like this story. It portrays the never ending torture the girls have to bear after marriage, specially the ones belonging from the lower to the middle class families. Its just that our culture has changed for the past few years and even if it is in the notice of the people, they fail do to anything about it. I would love to see this negativity vanish from our society. Looking forward to more blogs from this author :)Recommend

  • Ashar

    I’m on board with you with the message you convey but this is one side of the story, Daughter in laws are not innocent either. if you are bias towards the feminist i would like to see you writing an article how cruel are daughter in laws towards their in laws.Recommend

  • Maximus Decimus Meridius

    your attempt at sarcasm has been noted……aaaaand ignored.

    1) Try NOT to be sarcastic and cynical when commenting on blogs like this because the message is universal and NO ONE in their right mind objects to it or is against it. try sarcasm in the political blogs.

    2) When you are being sarcastic type /sarcasm on before your sentence and /sarcasm off after it. use this until you have learnt how to be sarcastic.

    3)try giving nice, fluffy comments for a change and try appreciating the bloggers for some time. Perhaps you will be better at that.
    Good Luck.Recommend

  • Nida Ejaz

    Very well written over such a delicate issue!Recommend

  • ullo bata

    another old rotten story re-re-writen umptienth time….YawnRecommend

  • Sane

    Creulty and torture by husbands and in-laws is the crime, against which there is no stern law. This is treated as ‘family matter’. In my opinion brutal acts of abusing and mental torture are more than act of murder. Law against such crimes must be promulgated having a punishment of at least 10 years.

    On the other hand married women must rise against such brutality and seek help from sober and reliable NGOs. It is better to live separately than to bear torture whole life.

    Must rise against beast like husbands and in-laws. Take them to the law and ensure they are duly punished.Recommend

  • s

    this is so true and the common notion is if there is no beating around or another woman then she is being difficult and “doesn’t know how to keep a home together” Its not just the lower middle classes either, sadly educated middle classes also suffer the same predicament. Instead of telling our girls to make it work we should encourage them to give life a chance for the sake or our daughters and our daughter’s daughters this insanity needs to end!Recommend

  • s

    OMG its not a competition. In laws are in their own homes the young girls relocate to a new environment and most of the time the in laws don’t even know why they are being to cruel or how much its affecting someone else. Noone wants their son to divorce but just to keep the daughters in law unhappy enough. Very strange notion! By the way making a family and focusing on it isnt being cruel its life.Recommend

  • s

    now ur just being stupid if you want to know what that means!Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Thank you so much :)Recommend

  • Ayesha

    I agree with you sir but writers prefer to highlight problematic issues because they need to be dealt with.Recommend

  • ahmed

    What was the husband doing all this time?Recommend

  • Secular

    simply accept that it was a mistake..
    everybody make mistakes.. :PRecommend

  • J.P Sharma

    Absolutely correct. Even in educated families too this phenomenon is present. A nice and eye opening article indeed it will certainly change some if not all I am sure.The Express Tribune brings such beautiful thought provoking articles & blogs one can’t resist reading all.Recommend

  • Ullo Bata

    Do you live with your parents & siblings?

    Do you share your income with your parents?Recommend

  • J.P Sharma

    That doesn’t mean daughters in law should be mistreated. It is certainly tells one’s upbringing how you treat women and of course your daughter in law.Every girl and a family has a right to marry off to any family higher than their own level. Why that becomes a licence to ill-treat any girl if your family is better off than the girl’s family.Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Thank you very much :)Recommend

  • Waqas Hassan Khan

    Indeed a very clear depiction of most of our domestic stories and the way these middle class married girls are treated . We need to move on leaving behind customary hatred and feud for all the new girls which become a part of a new family, it is also important to embrace them with open arms and love them as if they were our own daughters. We as humans need to be reminded from time to time what our social and religious obligations are being a part of this society. These long standing issues between Saas and Bahu needs to adressed and moderated once and for all. Thanks for such a nice and effective reminder. As for someone ranted the way you write, its very elegant and clear. Keep it as good as it is .Recommend

  • Hamza

    You clearly need to learn when to be sarcastic and when not to. Sarcasm is not required in an article such as this. Being sarcastic all the time doesn’t make you “cool” if that’s what you were trying to achieve.
    The author has done a pretty good job. At least she’s writing and highlighting this issue. Can you write better than this? I doubt that.Recommend

  • SamarYz

    This is nonfiction? Very sad…I honestly thought the writer made it upRecommend

  • SamarYz

    This is nonfiction? Very sad…I honestly thought the writer made it upRecommend

  • Gabba

    This is a plot stolen from HUM TV!Recommend

  • Rafay Ikram

    Unfortunately, its the stupidity of Pakistani Culture to treat others daughters like this while forgetting that they also have a daughter who someday is gonna go with some other guy and be treated like that …Recommend

  • Qasim Ahmad

    What part did her husband play???, Her sisters (in-law) will face it soon.They gonna get marry anyway..!!! “What goes around comes around”Recommend

  • http://nazarbaaz.blogspot.com/ 2#

    I am the second one to ask the same :)Recommend

  • Sane

    Solution is the correction of mindset and attitude.Recommend

  • Sane

    What is the delicacy in this issue? This is an issue like any other issue plagued humans and make humans as beasts.Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Okay see thing is…
    This isn’t the fault of the in-laws as such .. it is the fault of the girl’s parents.
    Pakistanis have this notion like the backward minded Hindus if I may say who degrade their women that ‘she HAS to get married else our honor will be ruined’, ‘Beta please tolerate the things your in laws dump on you because if you do not, your lousy no good husband will divorce you’, ‘This ‘maika’ isnt your home anymore, your ‘susraaal’ is’ and the list is endless..

    Oh and yes and not to mention ‘Parhaai ka kiya faaida beta.. shaadi karo ,, easy scene’ and in some cases girls emselves refuse to study further looking for a sugar daddy to pay their shopping expenses and the kids education dough..

    The mindset of the GIRL’S family needs to be straightened up first before anything else.
    There are numerous pathetic posts that say ‘Please take care of my daughter my future damaad, she is your responsiblity now’ I mean dudes seriously … get a grip, all humans are capable of being independent human beings…
    The message should be ‘beta, you try to mess with my daughter and see that I dont cut your head off because we are NOT afraid of the society’s ‘log kia kaheinge’ mentality and our daughter is an INDEPENDENT human being capable of earning money for herself and her kids’.

    I rest my case.Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Hooking up with other women ..
    Duh…Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Love can be found anywhere… class shouldn’t matter..
    Why is marriage more of a business deal in Paki society?Recommend

  • Tariq

    The most important role that can be played in these situations is by the husband. Most of this won’t happen if sisters and mother knows of the attitude of husband towards their acts, and how he might react, and ultimately leave them instead of her.Recommend

  • Supriya Arcot

    What’s new in this blog ? Though I sympathize with the heroine , must say that this is a clichéd subject . Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Thank you Hamza :)Recommend

  • Django

    Domestic violence should be termed as federal crime, only then some form of competence could be shown from govt in combating this menace. Before we even go there, lets start preventing this from our own surroundings. Now after reading this, when i look at it, i can feel how some of the married women feel when their iditotaa inlaws berate them as if they are objects that dont feel anything. I know some of my not so shareef and respectable friends who cheat on their wives and regularly take out their frustration by thrashing their kids. I just dont see a point as in how a 35 year old grown adult can slap his child with full power without feeling anything, be it kids, wives, a sarah or john..abuse either verbal or physical is just plain stupid! Nice Article Ayesha!Recommend

  • Visibly

    But obviously it must be repeated. As far as I understand, domestic physical and psychological abuse is extremely common in Pakistan. And it appears that most people consider this a private matter.
    In my country, domestic abuse also takes place, but the person doing it, usually a man, is considered a criminal. We support divorce in all such situations, and the man often receives a court order to leave their ex-wife alone and if serious, also prison. And perhaps most important: A man needing to use physical or psychological abuse to feel like a man is considered weak and not a man at all.
    Although women also participate in this abuse in Pakistan, the reason for them doing it is very much the same: And they should be called out for what they are: Psychopaths that only feel well by controlling and suppressing others.Recommend

  • Guest

    you have highlighted a serious issue of our society it has brought some tears and fears in me. after reading it i want to say
    1).such WOMEN who can’t bear a Daughter in law and can’t share their son should NEVER bring one innocent grl to home as a maid.
    2) such weak husbands who cant keep balance in their relationship and cant speak for their wife’s right should NEVER get married.
    i think i have few solutions for that poor girl ;)
    1: daughter in law should have found some “RISHTAA” for unmarried sister in laws,only then, they would be less frustrated and busy with their relationships and the strong bond btw mother and daughters would be weaker( although sis in laws could never be happy with a proposal which the bhabeee has found but even then it would work ;) )
    2: She should have started a job and spend quality time with her friends/colleagues and less time at home :p
    3: last but not the least if they dont give her respkt she should have spoken to elders of family/khandaan/biraadree or she should have come to the level of the in laws( i mean she should be care free and try to ignore her in laws by not serving tem) if they are such irritating and disrespectful ,,,,,,,,,,,,Recommend

  • chillipepper

    you have highlighted a major issue of our society the concept of “join family system” we have adapted from subcontinent …Islam dts y gives a concept of separate home after marriage.
    i think such women who just bring a daughter in law as a maid and cant share their sons…they should not allow their son to get married simple.The so called husbands who cant keep balance in their relationship and cant give the wife her due respect and rights should NEVER get married.
    i think if the girl was educated she should have started a job to enjoy her life with colleagues and friends and spend less time at home.
    she could have arranged some proposals for her frustrated sister in laws (i know they won’t be hapee with it either but still) it would have worked.
    she should have called a meeting of the seniors of family and reveal the truth and last but not the least if they treated her as a maid she should have stopped serving them and caring about them ,,, life is worth living .Recommend

  • Quratulann

    Ayesha one question in all the story where is his “hijra husband ” cant have eyes to see his poor wifi …..ya she only meant for her a Production machine lol Recommend

  • Teesra Haath

    This just depicts the prevalent mindset in our society. I wonder WHY the people in this country are so obsessed with marriage. It should be up to the person to decide when he/she wants to get married anyway. We don’t see Western parents/relatives pestering their children to find a partner as soon as they reach adulthood.
    The major flaw in our society regarding marriage is that over here, marriage is a union of two FAMILIES rather than two INDIVIDUALS (how it should be), and this in turn creates loads of unnecessary issues between the married couple. The families should just stay out of their personal lives. If they still think of the couple as ‘kids’, why bother getting them hitched?Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Just goes to show not every dude is the same …
    You are a good example kid.. (y)

    There was this quote by an author whose name has skipped my mind ‘You can tell how civilized your society is by the way it treats its women.’
    I didn’t need to think at all to figure where we rank – Hinduism copycats that we are, seeded by stone age values and corrupt traditions…Recommend

  • Guest

    its deplorable but in the blog i hv read many things the girl was facilitated with in real life i hv witnessed many a women who had the same story and couldnt njoy even basic needs… my advice for such so called husbands who get marry just for fun ,,,they should never get married untill unless they are mature enough to keep their responsibilities and give the due rights of every relation.
    the jealous mother in law should never bring a bahuuu if she cant share her son. the daughter’s parents are also responsible who threw their daughter in a dug blindfolded.
    the solutions which i think are
    1) the frustrated sister in laws should be married,it may weaker the strong bond btw mother & daughters, 2ndly they would be having teir own husbands so they might get less jealous with bhabeee :p
    2) the girl should start a job and live for herself after all she is not an indented slave,,,hangout with friends/colleagues ,,try to spend less time in dungeon(so called home).
    3) show the in laws a mirror by treating them the same way as they do… tongue is a great weapon after all & all women are smart enoughh to utilize it ;)Recommend

  • Dante

    Thank God this article isn’t putting 100% blame on men. Tired of reading that every single day. Should make all men feel like evil beings that perhaps should never have existed.Recommend

  • Jehanzeb Mahar

    Sharma ji it’s very sad that it happens but it is a fact Recommend

  • Jehanzeb Mahar

    Right Sarah; but many- not some, sorry to say -people consider status above everything Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Dear guest (wish you had provided a name) your comment was a pleasure to read — you are quite funny :) Thank you :)Recommend

  • Ayesha

    I agree with you :) Thank you :)Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Some great points there, Sarah! Thank you for your comment :)Recommend

  • http://nazarbaaz.blogspot.com/ 2#

    You seem to be completely unaware. Idealistic solutions are alright but are you staying in West? all your solutions are not practical back homeRecommend

  • http://nazarbaaz.blogspot.com/ 2#

    that was merely a lighter part of @disqus_jhV6dMTxfd:disqus untill the person apologized and ruined it hahaRecommend

  • nimra

    Yeh cheeeeeeeez!
    Love your comment, I just wish pakistanis understand this.. I would like to distribute brochures u know with ur message printed on it!Recommend

  • nimra

    Thought provoking !Recommend

  • Moiz Omar

    This is such a sad story. I feel so sorry for Sarah. :(. Shame on her in-laws and her “husband,” who openly let’s his siblings and mother abuse her. The Government should invest more in empowering women, so they aren’t forced into such “marriages.”Recommend

  • Lalit

    ET Please post it as everyone has the right to defend his faith.
    ”This isn’t the fault of the in-laws as such .. it is the fault of the girl’s parents.
    Pakistanis have this notion like the backward minded Hindus if I may say who degrade their women that ‘she HAS to get married else our honor will be ruined’,….. ”

    please don’t unnecessarily drag religion into an otherwise humane issue.
    My faith teaches me ”yatra naryastu pujyante,ramante tatra devata”(Gods have their abode where women are worshipped)..Hinduism doesn’t teach us to treat our womenfolk badly as Islam doesn’t teach you to do the same.Recommend

  • Lalit

    you seem to have some serious problems with Hinduism.
    and btw that great soul who uttered these words(he was referring to weakest members) was Mr MK Gandhi…Isn’t it strange ?Recommend

  • Lalit

    *Saudi ArabiaRecommend

  • chillipepper

    thnx ayesha .. due to a problem in internet connection it was posted as guestRecommend

  • chillipepper

    if yu feel my comments are IDEALISTIC then i suggest RE-READ them :p i hv SEEN many WOMEN facing SAME problem … and the only peace they found when they started a job ,,, rest are suggestions ,, yes its deplorable men get marry but dont fulfill responsibilities properly and women get jealous so soon.but still my comments are “COMIC RELIEF” in such a tension..we should look for the root cause and try to solve the problems i would still say SISTER IN LAW WHEN THEY’LL BE MARRIED ,THE BHABHEE WOULD BE “A LITTLE” RELIEVED.Recommend

  • chillipepper

    thnx ayesha ,,, m amazed y ET is not posting my comments?/?Recommend

  • Obaid Ullah

    Totally agree with you. The story has been cooked up using the centuries old drama of the daughter in laws that they are always treated harshly by the family of their husband. While n reality I see the opposite. In the markets, bazaars, restaurants, I see more daughter in laws enjoying the luxuries her husband could provide than he would have been spending on his mother or sisters.

    Grow up now, the story has changed. Today the family of the husband is more tormented by the family of the daughter in law and herself.Recommend

  • Ayesha

    Okay :) Thank you for your comment !Recommend

  • hassan

    ‘beta, you try to mess with my daughter and see that I dont cut your head off because we are NOT afraid of the society’s ‘log kia kaheinge’ mentality and our daughter is an INDEPENDENT human being capable of earning money for herself and her kids’.

    Girl’s father should really stress on this part its good and caring for the girl atleast who is going to a new place and these words will act as a insurance for the girlRecommend

  • mario

    Husbands don’t want to be dragged in mother-wife conflicts. they usually will never take their wives side over their mothers. The wife always has to compromise. Always.Recommend

  • mario

    Hahahaha are you joking? You obviously haven’t observed the dynamics of a susaraal. Your solutions are very simplistic. especially the last two.
    You should know, in most families, the girl will always be vilified. No body will take her side, and to just share her experience in a family meeting is akin to disaster. she will be a pariah for life.Recommend

  • mario

    it should be, would be could be…we’re not western. we’re eastern. that’s how things are. you cant change it. Your statements are very idealistic. they do not apply to our society at large.Recommend

  • chillipepper

    good to hear u laughed :p
    frst 2 statements are taunt Mr ,,, with the passage of time things change ,,,when there is a will there is a way ,,, wt do yu waNT she should not do some efforts and let her all babies die?
    the greater role is played by the lady bcz she is bearing every thing which is done to her,,,
    i agree with yu “she ll be pariah for life” but she can hope thats the only thing she can have ,,,Recommend

  • chillipepper

    m glad somebody “laughed” bcz of me in this tension :p
    i agree “she ll be pariah for life” …m really glad u kno ALL DYNAMICS OF SUSRAAL so yu may leave a better example :p
    wt do yu want she shouldnt take any step and let her all kids die?????????????? my opinion is still there “she is tolerating thts y she is FACING ” … good day and dont forget to laugh :pRecommend

  • chania

    I am afraid you are right about Sarah growing up to be the same as her mother-in-law. In fact I think that is where it comes from. The girl is raised to be always last, always the slave, the servant who puts up with whatever is dumped on her. First she is property of her father and brothers and later of her husband and in-laws. The finally her son grows up and marries, and at last there is someone coming to the house who SHE can have power over! What a delight for the abused woman – to at last have someone she can kick around – a slave of her very own!
    So it is sad – the abused becomes the abuser.Recommend

  • Syed

    Funny plus immature..Recommend

  • The Rebel

    And that is why as a society we’re largely screwed.Recommend

  • LS

    Ya – All problems in your life and your society is because of Hinduism… Let me give you a news flash that the relations between Mother-In-Law and Daughter-in-Law are dreaded world over and has nothing to do with Hinduism its just the nature of the relationship, Thankfully for them they live in different houses unlike in South Asia where people due to economic reasons live in joint families and face these problems there is nothing Hindu about it. Please shed the religious bigotry and stop looking at everything with religious angle and glasses…
    Recommend

  • LS

    I would say HUM TV stole the plot from life! Its sad that some people realize the reality of life only through TVRecommend

  • Sarah Uzair
  • Sarah Uzair

    Exactly! I guess its because my parents are this way but I have seen many of my friends’ parents who enforce the wrong beliefs such as the idea that marriage is the most important thing etc etc, it no doubt it because our religion commands it too but living as slaves or animals treated like doormats by in-laws is something females need to work towards to avoid.Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Anytime! :)Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    I am sorry about the religion part, it was a mistake on my part, I apologize Lalit.
    No hard feelings I hope.Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    I apologize, it was my brashness that led me to blame religion, Religion has nothing to do with how a society shapes its culture, Unfortunately, we are all stuck in the same boat – driven paranoid.Recommend

  • LS

    Thank you for your response. It is our responsibility to challenge status quo. Its not that in India we don’t have these kind of issues… we do but the funny thing that came out in a survey conducted in India where people thought that these kinds of problems take place in rural areas where people are poor… The result was quite the opposite. Most of these problems occurred in big cities and towns and among families who were educated! Things are changing and have changed a lot in last 10 years, Laws have made and that have curbed a lot of domestic violence but its long way to success.

    With best to you and your endeavors.Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Hhaha wow! Thankyou for sharing that with me. That is something that I bet noone here even knows. I will try my best to change the perspective of as many as I can reach. :)Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair

    Hhaha wow! Thankyou for sharing that with me. That is something that I bet noone here even knows. I will try my best to change the perspective of as many as I can reach. :)Recommend

  • Sarah Uzair