Can I please please please blog on ET?

Published: August 13, 2013
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It is one thing to be snubbed by male species than to get a nod of rejection from a lady. ILLUSTRATION: IMAAN SHEIKH

Call me a wannabe or a passionate writer who wants to break into a robust blogosphere sprawling across Pakistan; either way, I am shameless and relentless to the core. I will keep on coming back again and again, no matter how many times I get this message from the moderators:

“Hi,

Thank you for your interest in The Express Tribune.

Having read your post, we feel as though it doesn’t quite fit our section. Thus, I regret to inform you that we will not be running this particular piece. Please write to us on a different topic. Thank you for your consideration.

Kind regards,

XXXXXXXX”

Such messages come in all shapes, forms and sizes from ladies of different shapes and sizes (going by their profile pictures). One of the pearl of wisdom that I received from their side was:

“We received your blog and I regret to inform you that we will not be running it. We are looking for more positive pieces for August 14. Also the opening is very confusing, almost like a tongue twister. Thanks for your consideration. We hope you will write to us on a different topic.”

Here is another one:

“Having read your post, we feel as though the topic is good, but it falls short in execution and analysis. Thus, I regret to inform you that we will not be running this particular piece. Please write to us on a different topic. Thank you for your consideration.”

Someone put it this way:

“I regret to inform you that we will not be taking your blog, the reason being we’ve already carried two posts on Aamir Liaquat. You write well and we do hope that you will send us pieces on different topics.”

Others in this manner:

“Thank you for writing in to us. I wanted to let you know that, though your blog post is good and makes a very valid point, I regret to inform you that we will not be running it as we have already accepted another very similar post.”

With rejection pouring in thick and fast from the opposite sex, I soon realised that I have become a male chauvinist. It is one thing to be snubbed by the male species as compared to being rejected by a lady.

I must admit, at first I showered a whole vocabulary of cuss words on the blog desk for not entertaining my posts only to realise later that the blogs they select are far superior, well written and/or apt for the occasion. And, that I believe was a learning curve for me to improve my skills while writing for my personal blog.

Despite being rejected on a number of occasions I still incessantly write to The Express Tribune blogs as they get me hooked with occasional remarks like:

“You write well!”

Or healing my failure with a mellow:

“Have a nice day!”

Another thing that I noticed during the phase of submitting my blogs on various blogging platforms across Pakistan is that in comparison with the rest, the team at The Express Tribune blogs expeditiously reply to a random writer and give the occasional valuable advice for improvement to boot.

Not that I want a job at ET, as I have a lot of things to do in life but I want to sincerely thank Miss ‘Z’, Miss ‘I’, Miss ‘E’, Miss ‘B’ and other ladies working at Express Tribune blogs who haven’t yet had the privilege of rejecting my piece, for developing a progressive blogging community that encourages new ideas and justifies freedom of speech in letter and spirit.

Being an ardent follower of Malcolm Gladwell’s philosophy of ‘the 10,000 hours rule’, I believe I have got my work cut out before I can realise my dream of contributing for the coveted Huffington Post.

If this piece by any chance gets published then I have a long gratifying speech prepared to flatter the ET blog team.

Otherwise, as usual I would resort to my typewriter to jot down new ideas, finding solace in Quaid-e-Azam’s famous quote on this Independence Day:

“Failure is a word unknown to me.”

Asad Mustafa Kahlon

Asad Mustafa Kahlon

A social entrepreneur and minority rights advocate, who likes to write. He blogs at asadmustafa15.wordpress.com and tweets as @asadkahlon

The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of The Express Tribune.

  • yousuf

    Please publish those cuss words too -.- …:DRecommend

  • Dr. Amyn Malik

    And I am pretty sure you didn’t get the privilege of selecting this title for your blog :P

    But yes, the team is really good especially when it comes to replying to writers.Recommend

  • http://beautyrushco.wordpress.com/ Saba Chaudhry

    Perseverance is the key.
    Though I do not know you Asad, but I feel happy that you finally got an article published on ET! Keep it up and you might just make it to HP one day. :)Recommend

  • zaeem saqif

    same is the case with me… there is no place for wannabe writers in our country, and unluckily, ET is also not an exceptionRecommend

  • http://blogs.tribune.com.pk/author/1092/sakina-kavi/ Sakina

    Oh trust me, its the same! hehe.. i send in four blogs and one gets selected.. but that’s what keeps quality of the blogs section :)Recommend

  • http://nazarbaaz.blogspot.com Kashif Ajmal Malik

    HAHA I THINK THEY ARE RELATED TO MY INLAWS… NEVER EVER PUBLISH IT Recommend

  • Indian

    I think the ET blog team is made of some highly skilled and good individuals. They have always been nice to me, even though I belong to a foreign country. I think all the ladies working in the blog desk are very efficient, humble, and nice. The most important thing is that they’re maintaining the quality which is important. Needless to say quality is more important than quantity. Keep up the good work people!Recommend

  • Khatta-Mitha

    Nice blog. Hey I think you shouldn’t have uttered those words on these sweet ladies. After all they’re doing their job; nothing personal against you. If the blog is good they’ll take it otherwise try again. Simple. Btw did you apologize to them? Recommend

  • https://www.facebook.com/LoveTeamGreen?ref=hl Musadiq Khan

    They never sent me an email.Recommend

  • Talat Haque

    Blog on Blogging! Recommend

  • http://nazarbaaz.blogspot.com Kashif Ajmal Malik

    didnt I tell you? I got another “Great effort, however, … “ from blog desk. At least I’m getting perfect in predictions now haha Recommend

  • Nicely put!

    HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAAH! good one! I wonder if you really wrote it for selection! lolRecommend

  • Imad Uddin

    uff…look at the title pic..lol.
    it is clearly evident that the selection and presentation of blogs is getting more and more mature and refined on et.
    maybe the-only-illustrator-at-etblog-has should try using some other software for better illustrations…no dout that illustration skills have improved by miles….

    my condolences are with u my dear brother… lol
    Many a times I dint receive any reply for rejection. I am aware that the abnormal (horrible and cheap) ways I use for explaining are so much off the beat that nothing can be amended to improve them..probably unlike the author I have no ambition to be published at huff post or to dominate Paki blogsphere-dont have time for tht yet (so I dont send or publish my pieces anywhere- not even m own blog) nor do I belong to hizbut tehrir or any other ideological group whose intention is to radicalize people (so I dont write in religious newspapers)

    For me writing is a spritual thing. I write what I like and send it to et, just-in-case any single person may ever benefit from it. (now single means “one individual” doesnt mean unmarried!)Recommend

  • suzo

    ET should not have published this non sense! Extremely boring!Recommend

  • Another Indian

    Good article … a pleasant break from reading disturbing headlines.Recommend

  • http://www.facebook.com/britishmuslims Mohammed Abbasi

    Its haraaam to write in English!Recommend

  • Parvez

    After being turned away a hundred times a good friend of your must have whispered in your ear ‘ Asad…….why don’t you try flattery, it always works ‘.
    Have you ever tried even commenting on the DAWN site……….it will make you pull your hair out and drive you up the wall.
    By the way you do write well.Recommend

  • http://www.pltacademy.com Travel_Tart

    Never thought that it was difficult to write for ET. I was planning for some time.
    .
    You have discouraged me!!Recommend

  • Gracias

    Your dream is to write for the Huffington Post? LOLRecommend

  • Hina

    You didn’t mention “your blog should appear in comments section and not as a blog on it’s own!”Recommend

  • Anonymous

    @ Suzo

    Second time I’m reading a negative comment of yours,which is unreasonable.You neither say nice things to Indians,nor Pakistanis…any human on this sub-continent whom you like ?Recommend

  • http://www.twitter.com/BajiPlease Baji Pleases

    ET never responds to my emails let alone publish my blog. :(Recommend

  • Aneela

    ET never responded to my submissions either… even though I’ve been published elsewhere and contacted for interviews on the topic I wrote about; so I know I can’t be a terrible writer. Recommend

  • Shahla

    You realize there is a simple solution to getting a response from ET; email the piece again and politely ask for an update. The team has always responded to me.
    Quit your whining @Aneela Recommend

  • Noor E.

    Haha! Best blog i’ve read insofar!Recommend

  • Noor E.

    Best piece I’ve read insofar! Good job!Recommend

  • irfan

    Wonderful article. i really liked itRecommend

  • http://arfamasihuddin.wordpress.com Arfa

    I can relate to you! these rejection mails catalyzed my decision to blog! & then it was just me & my keyboard & my personal blog! :)Recommend

  • billy pilgrim

    Considering the drivel ET usually publishes now, I am very intrigued by these rejected pieces and would like the opportunity to uncontrollably ROFLMAO. Please create a free for all section asap.Recommend

  • Dante

    No wonder those ladies published this blog because you showered praises at them. Anyone would; acceptance is everyone’s desire.

    However this blog still neither fits the occasion, nor contributes any useful information to the readers. Recommend

  • Saad Durrani

    You got rejection emails. I never got those. :(Recommend

  • Rakshinda

    Haha i love this blog.
    Been there a lot of times. Sometimes when i talk to myself i think only ET blog desk team knows what a terrible writer i am
    But yes, only the finest blogs are published here.
    And not even once did i get the privilege of using my own title for a story :PRecommend

  • Prabhjyot Singh Madan

    Hip hip hooray !!!!! Where is the party dear author ? I enjoyed the blog seriously. Keep it up paaji. Rab rakhaRecommend

  • umar

    hahaha.. enjoyed reading this blog which at last published Recommend