Man dead for falling in love: Parachinar is taking us back to the stone ages

Published: March 14, 2013

They stoned him for 15 minutes; they disfigured the man to a point where even his family could not recognise him. PHOTO: AFP

A couple of weeks ago I read a blog post which delved into the rich prospects of the jirga system, its history and advantage to those who don’t have quick and easy access to the legal system in Pakistan. A couple of weeks ago, it made me ponder over my inflexibility towards accepting it as a system of justice – today I hold a strong stance against it.

Having practiced in the courts of Pakistan, I understand first-hand the issues that the common man would face in his quest for legal justice; acute delays, unending legal costs and corruption within the legal framework propelling frustration urging people to scramble towards any alternate method of dispute resolution- so long as justice is served. The frustration is understandable.

What seems to evade us however, is the meaning of the term justice. As variable as it may be, it is natural that justice to one may seem a punishment to the other. This is the paradigm that I tried to cope with when I heard the news of a young government official stoned to death in Parachinar for allegedly falling in love with a local tribeswoman.

Although the facts have yet to be confirmed, the boy was said to have “the thoughts of eloping” with the girl. The ‘astute men’ who drew that conclusion were obviously mind-readers.

The family of the girl caught the two conversing, brought them both to the girl’s house and then what took place was only one of the few horrific tales of vigilante justice we have come across. I say ‘vigilante justice’ on purpose because a jirga is not a legal system fit for the duty of handing out justifiable verdicts; vigilante justice because the decision was not only illegal but also inhumane.

A local jirga was approached with the dilemma where it was decided that the boy and girl be put to death.

The procedure decided henceforth was stoning to death for the boy – for which he was taken to a local graveyard and stoned by 300 men. 300 men – the sheer magnitude of this number shows how intolerant and immortally blood thirsty our nation has become.

They stoned him for 15 whole minutes; they disfigured the man to a point where even his family could not recognise him.

That is the justice they dealt out for ‘dishonouring’ the women of the tribe.

But to whom was ‘justice’ served here? The boy, who lies, deformed, buried six feet under the ground or the girl who is to be put to death? Whose honour did this act of savagery redeem; the parents who are now daughter less or the daughter who may now be dead?

Please understand that the illiterate minds of the  grotesquely misguided jirga behind this decision are not solely to be blamed. It is the 300 men who willingly and perhaps even joyfully carried out the verdict who are guilty of murder. Moreover, it is the girl’s parents to whom the fault should be appropriated. Had the people who had noticed the rendezvous between the girl and boy minded their own business or even asked the families to resolve the matter,  a boy would not be dead today.

Who knows what atrocities the girl is to face?

Had this case been taken to any legitimate court in Pakistan, it would have been dismissed for having no basis at all. It would have been dismissed because there was no crime committed – such is the weightiness of the act; talking to someone from the opposite sex. Yes, this would have been a time-consuming task, but one that would have cost money, not lives.

Yet, they chose to let the jirga decide the fate of the man and the girl. They chose to have them killed. They chose to be murders- all 300 of them.

Congratulations! Thanks to the justice system you chose, you earned yourself a first class ticket to hell.

Justice delayed is better than justice distorted.

Do you approve or disapprove of the jirga system of justice?

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Read more by Erum here or follow her on Twitter @shaikherum


Erum Shaikh

The writer is a News Editor at The Express Tribune and has an Undergraduate Degree in Law from the University of London. She tweets @shaikherum (

The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of The Express Tribune.

  • Ayesha Pervez

    I want to CRY !Recommend

  • http://USA Observer

    Hence the reason why the world hates Pakistan and Muslims. Recommend

  • O2

    It is really shocking whenever we get to hear such horrific news from our tribal area’s or even in Pakistani cities.

    first we need to clarify that this not an Islamic culture, you have to read the shariah law to get to know a fair idea about such issues. in order to prove an illicit relationship you need 4 witnesses & if it is proven then under Islamic law there are only lashes for such an offence & not stoning!

    tribal areas have their own set of rules & regulations which date back even before they accpeted Islam.Recommend

  • Hassaan

    Absolutely disgusting! SHAME Recommend

  • Stranger

    What choice did the public have when the Jirga ( the elders of the community ) asked them to stone this man to death. If they dont comply they will be ostracised. Hence they had to do it whether they liked it or not.Recommend

  • Sakhi

    Life must have been better in Stone Age than the life of the modern capitalist age. Recommend

  • Nandita.

    Islamic law there are only lashes for such an offence & not stoning!

    That’s pretty harsh/barbaric as well.

    Falling in love is not an offence so there’s no reason why people should be chastised for having an affair.
    I am not well versed with Islamic law – if what you say is true, Muslims ought not to follow it blindly. Humans have an organ called the BRAIN- why not make use of it? Please ask yourselves the following questions –

    a. Why is it wrong for a man or a woman to choose his or her own partner?
    b. Why right do village elders have to interfere in people’s lives and make decisions for them. Why shouldn’t people have the right to live their lives on their own terms? Recommend

  • Mj


    Where did they get the idea of the barbaric practice of stoning from anyway? I doubt that it was practiced in this region before the arrival of a certain desert culture.Recommend

  • ali sindhi

    well i would like you to write same blog in urdu and take a VOTE and see the over confidante land of pure mentality Recommend

  • Shah

    such examples need to be set every where. If the judiciary(Qaazi) is independent enough that he can decide the fate of the accused in the light of Quran, then our society will no more suffer. Such things needs to be appreciated rather than condemned by the so called social tikadaarsRecommend

  • akbar ali

    i don’t that what really happened but according to Islam four eye witness are required for “sansar” and law is different for married and unmarried one for married person both man and women should be killed with stone and unmarried one should be given “korre” but this punishment is not on talking or just touching. and the four eye witness should have seen them on the real act of sex. otherwise they do not come under such law of punishment. Recommend

  • Pessimist

    Parachinar is taking us back to the stone ages

    Target killings? Mob mentality? Burning down Christian homes?

    I think we are already half way there….Recommend

  • Mj

    Views of Harsh Punishments – Pew Global.

    We have a serious problem and there is a need to talk about it to reevaluate our sadistic bearings along modern values.Recommend

  • Un-known

    Pakistan is barely a capitalistic state!Recommend

  • I am a Khan


    The punishment in Shariah of 100 lashes for the boy and girl is only if they had sex outside marriage and both were unmarried. This punishment shows that immorality is a serious problem in society and has to be controlled. However, falling in love with someone, does not have any punishment in Islam. If a couple fall in love, they are free to get married. Love marriages are not banned at all in Islam. Love marriages are thought of as taboo in the tribal culture of some parts in Pakistan, which has nothing to do with Islam. Recommend

  • Aina Maria Waseem

    I agree that the tale is grotesque indeed, and in Pakistan, it is not the exception but the rule. All my life, through dramas on PTV in particular, I had only ever been exposed to this ghastly side of the jirga system. I hated the very concept of panchayat and jirga. Therefore I was intrigued indeed when my leader Imran Khan espoused it in his book, causing me to think again. What I got to thinking, is that the “system” is not synonymous with those who practice it. Tools do not an action make. Hand me a Smith and Wesson anytime and I’m not likely to shoot even my worst enemies with it. All this leads me to the conclusion that Sir (Imran Khan) was correct in essence. Justice delayed is definitely justice denied, and any argument that attempts to advocate one system by pointing out the demerits of the other cannot be compelling. The root cause for all of Pakistan’s ills is the lack of education. The way I have always seen it is, that there are three kinds of people in Pakistan, the first rare beings are the educated minds, the next and most common are the illiterate, and the last are the educated illiterate. Let’s keep the blame squarely where it lies, on the shoulders of the persons who handed this judgment, those who implemented it, and the parents of the girl in question. Perhaps it is the likes of you and me who deserve most of the blame. If educated and affluent people are not willing to take a step to try to solve these issues, I’d like to know who is! But then if we were all as intrepid as Imran Khan, Pakistan wouldn’t be where it currently standsRecommend

  • I am a Khan


    Stoning to death is a punishment in Shariah (Divine Law) but it has several conditions before it can be carried out:

    The man and woman must have had sex and both must be married to other people.
    4 Independent Men or 8 Independent Women must have actually seen the man and woman perform the act.

    If either of these two conditions is not met, this punishment cannot be given. The Islamic Scholars say it is virtually impossible to find so many eye witnesses who actually saw the penetration. Hence this punishment cannot be carried out, if Shariah rulings are to be followed. This punishment of stoning to death is just as a deterrent, and to explain to human beings how serious and immoral adultery is, so that people avoid it despite any temptation. Just same as many countries including the USA, have the death penalty for Treason, Adultery is treason with one’s own family. Even then, the conditions for the punishment are so stringent, its almost impossible for them to be met. Recommend

  • Umair Jabbar


    Just to clearify,
    Islam doesn’t stop men or women from choosing their partners, Islam stops them from having pre-marital physical relationship.

    As far as the interference of villagers is concerned, that is not how the islamic justice system is supposed to be, so yes the interference from local people is wrong here but I would disagree with your point about people living their lives on their own terms. If my terms are in collision with some basic principles of the society I live in then it will be a problem for me and the society to get going together.Recommend

  • zee

    are you crazy or something??? Murder is not allowed in IslamRecommend

  • Nandita.

    I’m inviting trouble here but I’m still going to speak out :

    As far as pre marital sex is concerned:
    Sexual relations between two consenting adults is not the business of village elders,bearded mullahs,neighbours,the maya khans of the world,relatives or even family members.
    Young unmarried adults have the right to remain sexually active if they so desire without having the neighbourhood peeping into their bedrooms and delivering sermons on morality. Their bodies-their choice. The rest of the world should stay out of it.Recommend

  • Mj

    @I am a Khan:

    Go watch a video of stoning first and then defend that barbaric practice. I doubt it can be done without killing a part of your humanity.Recommend

  • Aina Maria Waseem

    @Nandita: What happens in Pakistan is rarely Islamic culture and mostly it is the culture of the region itself. Of-course Islam gives both men and women the right to choose whom to marry. It is PAKISTANI culture that prevents them from doing so. It is the whims of the families that are being satisfied and not poor old maligned Islam. A lot of things are happening in Pakistan in the name of Islam and this is just one of them.Recommend

  • O2

    Well you surely lack knowledge of what “Shariah law” is, so I can understand why you. & your fellow Indians, come here & bash Islam without having any prior thoughtful insight of Islam. :)

    well 100 lashes (which are hit lightly) for unmarried boy & girl is the punishment, & that too if they are found to be having sex, & like somebody said, it is hard to find so many witnesses for such a thing. A boy & girl hanging out or meeting each other is disliked but has no punishment in Islam, but in some cultures it is totally disapproved & they go to an extent of killing people which is totally un-islamic. As for married people found to be involved with someone else out of the wedlock, then stoning is the punishment for that man or woman who breaches the contract of marriage, marriage is sacred in Islam & this is the reason why there is such a severe punishment for adultery, & because of the severity it is a great deterrent against such immoral behaviours which can damage a family.

    you, & other non-muslim Indians, really need to study Islam before you bash Islam.Recommend

  • Umair Jabbar


    As far as pre marital sex is concerned In a country with Islamic laws, it is a crime. similarly as the use of some drugs is a crime in some countries and not others. And when you commit a known crime, the state holds the right to punish you according to the laws they have.

    Having said that, I am not defending the act done by the people in that village, as I said the right to punish is with the state and not with local people.Recommend

  • O2

    so will you disobey the law of land of any country you are in just because of the fact that it is your desire to do anything? lol. There is a reason why Islam disapproves pre-marital sex, just check out the statistics of how many teen mothers are there in the western world, just read about their hardship then you’ll know & how people go for abortion (which is a murder of a child) in our part of world because they cannot afford to be pregnant before marriage, but then people like you don’t see abortion as a murder. There are rules for some reason & as long as we abide by them a society will not break up.Recommend

  • Chitrali

    @ I am a Khan..You should know that the punishment for zina(sexual intercourse with a married woman) is clearly described in the Holly Quran which is to punish them with lashes.So how could you say that stonning is allowed according to sharia law.If your claim is true then please sent me the Ayyah where Allah gives the order to kill the suspect with stones… Recommend

  • Voice of Parachinar

    Last time I checked people of FATA are not constitutionally claimed to be human and when such incident happens no one need to cry out loud. Where were these voices when shia of parachinar were slaughtered. Five long years people of parachinar wasn’t allow to use road. Our fate was decided by most wanted terrorist the Haqqani Group in Islamabad. Yes people hate men in uniform but there is every reason for this hatred. More than 2000 people died and thousands disabled in last five years. Between this was the first time in Kurram Agency history where convict was stone to death. Normally they use AK 47. Recommend

  • I am a Khan


    Read my previous reply attentively, you will get your answers. The stoning to death carried out nowadays, has nothing to do with Shariah. It is carried out without sufficient evidence by a bunch of angry people who have little knowledge of Islam. Islamic rulings are not even followed. Recommend

  • I am a Khan

    I will disagree with you that the sex life of two unmarried adults is their own business. This is because when a child is born out of their carnal desires and has to stay with a single parent for life, then who is responsible for that poor child’s troubles?? Islam controls sex outside marriage, as do all religions. Islam allows people to choose their own partner and marry the person they love. In this instance, the illiterate villagers have done a grave sin according to Islam, by killing two people just because they wanted to marry each other. Recommend

  • Mj

    @Aina Maria Waseem:

    A woman has to get permission from father/guardian for a marriage proposal while there is no such obligation for a man. Plus there’s the fact the polygamy is allowed for men but not for women.Recommend

  • http://NewYork Hyderabadi

    My understanding is before Islam the people of that region were Buddhist. This is primitive Islamic culture.Recommend

  • Nandita.


    CO2 – you ought to read comments carefully before accusing people of maligning Islam. My comment was based on your explaination of Islamic law.Recommend

  • Mj

    @I am a Khan:
    ” This punishment of stoning to death is just as a deterrent, and to explain to human beings how serious and immoral adultery is, so that people avoid it despite any temptation.”

    I find it strange that relations with right-hand possessions (slaves) are not considered to be damaging at all, whereas consensual relations between two people are grounds for flogging or stoning.Recommend

  • nomi

    really disgusting. Recommend

  • Qaisrani

    @Voice of Parachinar:
    If they were persecuted by Haqqani, then it is justified to stone a couple who wanted to marry of their free will?? Are you in your senses???
    People donot know where to stop when it comes to tribal (dis)honor.Recommend

  • Major Interjector

    This isn’t about the Jirga system. The Jirga system is sound. It promotes civic participation and is an excellent method to keep people for all walks of life connected at the grassroots level. Having spent over two years total serving in FATA, I know for a fact that decisions like this don’t come easy or unanimously for that matter. This is an obvious sign of frustration or anarchy by the locals. Parachinar and Kurram in general are extremely unsafe because of the constant sectarian fighting; but in this particular case it was against a government official which means it could have been because he may have been Sunni or Shia (Parachinar is Shia majority); or it might be because the people in that particular village or community are anti-government (who’d blame them); or it could be that that particular tribe is aligned or receives protection from the TTP. FATA needs to be brought to the mainstream and the best way to do that is by promoting the Jirga system, by installing prominent and educated members (Ex military, civil service, politics, etc.) of their respective clans-who aren’t afraid-as tribal chiefs. And most importantly immediately abolishing the draconian FCR and getting rid of the Political Agents-who more often than not are involved in much of what is illegal in FATA. You can’t expect people who’ve lived under austere condition in a hostile or rough environment (South Bronx, Peckham) to have your “enlightened” views of life (Upper East Side, East Finchley), whether its right or not. At the least its very unfair to expect someone who hasn’t been fortunate enough to have the same opportunities-which you probably didn’t even work for. Considering how immoderately arbitrary and nauseatingly contrived your piece is I wouldn’t be wrong in assuming that you’re one of those confused “Lahor/Karachi/Isloo-ite” airheads whose life revolves around mimicking and plagiarizing Anglo-American trends and culture such as “liberalism” and “feminism”, yet with a tinge of “desi”, so YOU know (sarcasm) where your roots are. If you understood a thing or two about trends you’d know that the actions undertaken by the people in Parachinar (which I do not condone) are no worse than the public execution of the two young boys in Sialkot or the killing of the Punjab Governor, events displaying equal if not greater barbarity considering Punjab is supposed to be vastly more developed (by third world standards) than FATA. Recommend

  • Nandita.


    will you disobey the law of land of any country you are in just because of the fact that it is your desire to do anything?

    The couple in question did not break the law of the country. The author ( who has studied law herself ) has highlighted that fact in the write up. —- Had this case been taken to any legitimate court in Pakistan, it would have been dismissed for having no basis at all.

    As far as I am concerned – I don’t need religious texts to tell me how to live my life- I would flee any country whose environment I found stifling.

    As for the ponit about a child being born out of wedlock is concerned : yes, that would be an unfortunate circumstance. Couples who do engage in pre marital sex should exercise caution and use protection. If your only concern is about the children being born out of such relations-using protection would take care of that. But this is about something else isn’t it ? Men like yourself consider themselves the thakedaars of religion and morality.

    Please stop bashing the west. Teenage pregnancies are preferable to lovers being stoned, honour killings, women being married to men twice their age, women being humiliated beyond belief by being asked to share their husbands with three other women, women not being allowed to ride motorcycles, women not receiving an education, women not being able to dress the way they want, women not being able to walk down a road, women being raped and harassed,acid attacks.. the list is endless.Recommend

  • Nandita.


    will you disobey the law of land of any country you are in just because of the fact that it is your desire to do anything?

    I would never step into a country where fundamental human rights would be denied to me. :) Recommend

  • observer


    Well you surely lack knowledge of what “Shariah law” is, so I can understand why you. & your fellow Indians, come here & bash Islam without having any prior thoughtful insight of Islam

    I believe Al Bukhari is neither an Indian nor can he be accused of lacking knowledge of Shariah. On Zina (extra marital sex), the most accepted collection of Hadith Sahih al Bukhari has 4 entries (under 3829, 8804, 8805 and 8824) which refer to death by stoning.

    Can you check the Hadith, please.Recommend

  • External Hand

    @Aina Maria Waseem:

    You have put your point across very eloquently. The only discordant note is the heavy hero-worship of Imran Khan. I think the sooner you develop a healthy cynicism towards politicians, the less disappointed you will be when nothing will change. Peace. Recommend

  • Nandita.

    @Umair Jabbar:

    As far as pre marital sex is concerned In a country with Islamic laws, it is a crime.

    What I am saying is that it shouldn’t be a crime. Human rights should take precedence over antiquated laws. A persons sexual life is his business alone. Recommend

  • Parvez

    You have put forward a strong argument, by quoting a case study where the punishment was far in excess of the crime and have so condemned the jirga system.
    Now playing the devils advocate here, the jirga system that is a tribal system of justice also settles many minor cases of disputes according to custom which is accepted by the locals. It saves money and justice is done and more importantly is seen to have been done.
    To do away with the jirga system, you must have a judicial system that provides quick and just relief to the people. The present judicial system, absolutely fails to do so and therefore just wishing the jirga system way, will not work.Recommend

  • amir jafri

    Itv was not for so-called was for ADULTERY..writer claims to be a lawyer (itself not a great achievement ,anyway)…Nothing happend to shareef people in Pakistan , only westoxicated minds have this mental imbalance.

    Act, dress, talk Muslim and Pakistani …and flaunt proud of it wherever you be.Recommend

  • Asad

    @Stranger: No. No one can force me to commit a heinous crime. I’m sorry.Recommend

  • Voice of Parachinar

    You are living in fool paradise. This particular case has nothing to do with islamic sharia law. But it was a lesson to men in uniform to mind their own business and do what they are paid for. Hope lesson is being learnt. There is no place for love because the same people are cutting our throats with nara e taqbeer. This is not bangladesh, where you raped innocent civilians. Welcome to the tribal world. For such crimes mostly tribal people silence them with just one bullet of Ak 47. That’s enough.
    Between this decision was taken with will of Political Agent, though he offered 3 million in compensation to let him go. But at the end rules are rules, be it jungle rule or civilized rule under constitution. Thats what Pakistan taught us to not sacrifice when it comes to rule of law. Why would you expect us to not follow the rules set by the government.
    As far as Haqanni group is concern, they tried their best to get foot on our soil but as usual some went empty handed and most went to paradise. Recommend

  • O2

    I didn’t talk in context of this incident, I was telling you about a prescribed Islmaic law, which these tribal people don’t get it nor non-Muslims get it, & nobody is forcing you to stay in a country where Shariah law is practised! In this incident it is not clear what had happened & whatever they did was not according to Islamic law.

    As for protection, no protection is 100% fool proof, so if somebody gets pregnant then that person either kills that child or those children are brought up in a broken family & that child is usually stigmatised by the society for rest of his life- all this at the cost of desire? No, Thank you :) and as for those people who have illicit relationship despite being married to someone, then for that punishment is severe, so choice is simple either breach your marriage contract & face punishment for one desire or be faithful to your partner & family. Rules are practical & there is a huge difference between family system of west compared with family system of Muslims.

    There are many rules set by a country, why don’t you break those rules & tell your Govt that its your life? can you do that? why don’t you advocate the free will of life in front of your Govt? Recommend

  • Syed

    We are very unfortunate people as we have corrupt government, politicians, sick agencies, crazy terrorists running the country. I wish I see law and order in my country, specially in the FATA area. Why are we so incompetent that we can’t control that area? There is just so much bad everywhere that even somewhat normal people are taking law in their own hands. This is no way to punish anyone like that. The people have seen so much killing, destruction that they have lost their feelings. May Allah help us all. Recommend

  • The Rebel

    I don’t get why no one comes up with the story of how Hazrat Khadija ( Prophet Muhammad’s (PBUH) first wife ) ended up marrying him. She married him OUT OF LOVE. Yes people, love. Because she liked everything about him. That’s called love, but the conservative people can call it whatever tickles their fancy. Really don’t know which Islam do these people follow or which Quran have they read.Recommend

  • Voice of Parachinar

    @Erum Shaikh

    Parachinar is taking us back to the stone ages

    Miss Erum, Parachinar did not take anyone to the stone ages but its the Pakistan itself who took us to the stone ages. What were you expecting from illiterate jahils whom are forced to fight against each other (shia sunni) from last four decades. When such thing happens in province then you have every right to use that statement but when you use such statement for people like us, it absolutely beyond our senses. Recommend

  • I am a Khan


    Relations with ‘right hands possession’ means ‘slave wives’. It does not mean relations out of wedlock. Islam clearly allows men to marry either free believing women or believing slave women. So ‘slave women’ or ‘right hands possession’ are used interchangeably and have to be married by a man. Read Surah Nisa Chapter 4 of the Quran for details. There is no relaxation on sex outside marriage, in Islam. The slave women have to be married by their consent and they cannot be forcefully married as also mentioned in Surah Nisa (Chapter 4) of the Glorious Quran. Finally the concept of slavery in Islam is not like Roman slavery. Its more like modern day servants. The Holy Prophet’s Servant or so called ‘Slave’ was his adopted Son- Hazrat Zaid (rA). Thats the kind of noble treatment awarded to them. Recommend

  • I am a Khan


    Relations with ‘right hands possession’ means ‘slave wives’. It does not mean relations out of wedlock. Islam clearly allows men to marry either free believing women or believing slave women. So ‘slave women’ or ‘right hands possession’ are used interchangeably and have to be married by a man. Read Surah Nisa Chapter 4 of the Quran for details. There is no relaxation on sex outside marriage, in Islam. The slave women have to be married by their consent and they cannot be forcefully married as also mentioned in Surah Nisa (Chapter 4) of the Glorious Quran. Finally the concept of slavery in Islam is not like Roman slavery. Its more like modern day servants. The Holy Prophet (SAW)’s Servant or so called ‘Slave’ was his adopted Son- Hazrat Zaid (rA). Thats the kind of noble treatment awarded to them. Recommend

  • Hafeez

    We are practicing Jahalat in the name of religion!!! continued barbaric practices!! :((((Recommend

  • Voice of Parachinar

    @Major Interjector

    Let me take you back to Zia era. In the era of Zia Ul Haq, people of Parachinar were the first who oppose sponsored talibans (The Good and Loyal Afghan Talibans) and let me remind you “Black Day” was observed on Zia first ever visit to Parachinar in order to take tribal elders in confidence to support his holy jihad. His flight only lands for few minutes and then diverted back to GHQ. After that he tried his best to flush out all shias from Parachinar through various sectarian groups but without any success. People of Parchinar never attacked army or government official to settle down old scores. There is no support of TTP (Bad Talibans), as we are fighting with them since April 2007. Even our armed forces did not killed as many TTP jihidis in whole Pakistan as alone people of Parachinar did. Parachinar took Pakistan away from stone age both in ruthless Zia era and modern TTP era.

  • nadeem khan


  • Eye-S-Eye

    Ms. Nandita, I respect your views, concerns on the topic, the religion Islam and the right to be get-physical before marriage. Its totally ones choice and eventually one him/herself would be accountable/answerable for his/her acts.
    Your very latest comment on living in the country where you talked about the lack of humanitarian fundamental rights and that endlesslist you referred to, Keeping all that in mind, how would you accentuate & justify the series-of-ghastly sexual assaults that have had hit our neighbours- the Indians? Where were the humanitarian rights, the govt, court and my-body-my-choice(whoso ever I target for assualt) mentality?

    Mods: please refrain from tweeking any wording. Let it throughRecommend

  • Lil Mosh

    **”The procedure decided henceforth was stoning to death for the boy – for which he was taken to a local graveyard and stoned by 300 men. 300 men – the sheer magnitude of this number shows how intolerant and immortally blood thirsty our nation has become”
    Please use some common sense,we have not become backwards or intolerant or bloodthirsty or any other thing as some readers and the writer suggests,instead many people of this society have progressed and acheived a higher state of moral and ethical principles,sadly and ignorantly enough ,they donot/cannot or maybe dont want to understand the psychi of a group of people who live almost as their ancestors lived a few 50 to hundred years ago!!!


  • Gp65

    You approve of a boy bein stoned to death because he spoke to a girl?Recommend

  • Gp65

    @Aina Maria Waseem:
    Before Islam came to the area that is currently Parachinar, the people were Buddhists. It is unlikely that stoning to death was part of their local culture.

    @Nandita : Well spoken.Recommend

  • Baba Ji

    —- “Although the facts have yet to be confirmed“—– pleeeeease !!! establish the facts first ….Recommend

  • Virkaul

    That is why on Wednesday night, you see traffic jam at the Saudi-Bahraini causeway, where pure Muslims from the Kingdom rush in to their Filipino concubines over the weekend. But who knows, the lady back home does? A Pakistani chauffeur fills void for a few Rials.Recommend

  • Virkaul

    @Voice of Parachinar: Going through all the blogs, your comment seems to come out right from the heart and hence most sincere and true. Lack of education, medieval practices not commensurating with times, lack of sensitivity, intolerance, etc., have been responsible for this rut to have set in. Recommend

  • Mariam


    Pre- marital sex is not allowed in Islam. Thats the way it is –like it or not. No one asked you to convert to Islam. Also punishment should be left to God. We are no one to judge these personal matters. This punishment was just cruel and sickening. Recommend

  • Gp65

    @amir jafri:
    A man was talking to a girl – where is the adultery? Also does your law permit 300 people stoning a man who is buried in sand for a full 15 minutes. In case of adultery? Recommend

  • sure?

    Please check the references provided by @observer. Stoning to death is the shariah penalty for adultery. The question is does the Pakistani law prescribe either lashes or stoning as punishment? Secondly was due process of law used to prove adultery? Talking to a woman certainly does not constitute adultery.Recommend

  • Gp65

    Your jirgas seem not very different from our panchayats. I think 2 differences stand out. Law has made it mandatory that 1/3 rd of Panchayat members must be women, so there is representation of women which would moderate the impact of outright chauvinism.

    Secondly, if any decision by the panchayat is inconsistent with Indian constitution, such a decision is illegal an ignition and if someone goes to regular courts, that decision will be struck down. Most recently after the Delhi gang rape a Haryana khap panchayat decreed that none of the women from that village would wear jeans. Women’s group went to the courts and that decision was struck down.

    So jirgas dispensing justice might be an acceptable compromise as long the types of crimes they are allowed to rule is defined and limited to civil matters rather than criminal matters and the type of punishment cannot be inconsistent with the country’s constitution and finally there is a right to appeal in regular courts. Recommend

  • Fauwad

    Spot-on, Good going Mariam. :) Agreed.Recommend

  • Qaisrani

    @Voice of Parachinar:
    being a humanist, i can not say you are being treated what you deserve afer looking the way you support that inhumane act.
    Donot lecture me about tribal cultures and traditions, i know all such useless terminologies very well.
    Let me assure you, youth is there, music and love will always be there. Donot make a thing to romaticise.Recommend

  • Sher Ghazi

    I am pure fan of love but the way which soldier choose to take his love across the line of customs and tradition of Parachinnar is really the end of love in these circumstances. If he really love her then he must talked to her family and try to convince them and take his love with respect and dignity. But he choose wrong way to get his love where the result is same which he faced, but i really condemn the methodology of killing.Recommend

  • Qaisrani

    @Sher Ghazi: @Admin, where is your censor. A person openly arguing methos of killing and you people have let him to publish whatever nonsense he wrote.
    Are you people tribal by nature too. RIP English,once languae of sane people.Recommend

  • Aun


    Bukhari was written after more than 200 yrs of Prophet passed away. May I dare say, there is a margin of error (intrepretation) since it was passed on through the word of mouth.

    Believe we should look at the quran for clear guidance. Recommend

  • s.s

    sister u said that it is not wrong for man and woman to fall in love and why its said in islam about the lashes !
    first of all the lashes this is for an illegal relationship like an extra marital affair or having sexual relationship without getting married which is illegal . Love is something completely different.. islam has given complete permission of one choosing ones’s oown life partner. but all this should be done in legal ways. Islam says that if u like someone u r in love woth someone you should approach his or her family get married and continue your relation in a legal and decent way. Recommend

  • Mj

    @I am a Khan:
    “So ‘slave women’ or ‘right hands possession’ are used interchangeably and have to be married by a man. ”

    False. There is however prohibition on forcing slaves into prostitution Lastly, if there was a need to marry slaves before coitus, then tell me why is it that a slave is to be set free if she gave birth to a child or converted to Islam?

    Surely you don’t ‘release’ your ‘wife’ after she has given birth? Recommend

  • s.s

    IF having sex with anyone is one’s own business and others should not get involved in it then y do ppl get divorced when they find their partners cheating on them ??
    the problem is dear that once these things get started they never stop… you wanna know y islam has rule for this kind of thing that are so harsh ? its because islam knows the nature of HUMAN.. once you get the taste of crime and u know that u can commit a sin without getting punished u will never stop… what u r saying is like ok let me have a disease and then i will get the treatment for it .. but y should v get that disease and then cure it .. y not taking preventive measures before and stopping the disease at its root … i hope u r getting my point… Recommend

  • Mj


    Totally butchered my comment :/Recommend

  • Rashid

    “stoned to death in Parachinar for allegedly falling in love with a local tribeswoman.” If they stoned the guy for “falling in love”, this is horrendous. If they stoned the man for being involved in illicit relationship (talking with a non-Mahram), this is absolutely wrong. Even if they stoned the man for allegedly having illegal sexual (intercourse) relationship, this is not according to the Shari’ah unless four witnesses are produced (who are good Muslims) who have seen the actual “act of penetration” (the penetration of male private part into the female private part). The quantum of evidence is very high. This shows that the punishment prescribed has the purpose of deterrence, and not of “victimising” people. Therefore, NOT a single person was convicted of adultery in lifetime of Holy Prophet (Peace be upon him). The extremely few cases (1, 2 or 4 if I can remember correctly) during the lifetime of Holy Prophet (Peace be upon him) were of those who themselves conceded to have done adultery and wanted the punishment to be carried upon them, and even that was clearly tried to be avoided by Holy Prophet (Peace be upon him) by means of ambiguities, as comes in the Hadith literature. Recommend

  • Sab33N

    There are a lot of comments which are complete nonsense. The act of stoning is condemnable and there are no two ways to look into it.

    I would also like to rectify a few Indians where they seem to think that practice of stoning originated from Islam. It was in place before that. References can be found in Old testaments if anyone wants to look. There is a very specific story with regards to a women who was accused of adultery and was brought to Jesus Christ for stoning and it where the eternal words were said by Jesus “Let He Who Is Without Sin Cast The First Stone”..

    Nevertheless this practice is barbaric and sadly people who are deciding fate of others do not know the first thing about Islam or its teachings. There are very specific guidelines requiring witnesses of credibility who have actually seen the act from their own eyes while it is being performed (the act of sex that is) . Punishment comes at a very later stage.

    I agree with Nandita that sex is a decision between two consenting adults and if some of us believe in the Day of Judgment, then we will be punished by the Lord on that day for all our sins including adultery. No human, no Muslim, no mullah has the right to determine who lives and who dies purely on mere judgment & his / her own distorted version of Islam.Recommend

  • Parvez

    @Gp65: Apparently you understood what I was trying to get at. Yes, the jirga system is badly flawed but in the absence of a workable system, it will function out of necessity.

  • Umar Farooq Khawaja

    @Stranger: So their choice was to either kill someone or be ostracized. Are you kidding me?

    Even a simple reading of Islam will make it absolutely clear that stoning to death is a punishment reserved for the most blatant cases of overt sexual behaviour. It requires 4 eye witnesses to have witnessed the sexual act. For there to be that many eye witnesses, you have to literally be doing it in the street. Also, talking to a member of the opposite sex does not constitute an act requiring stoning to death.

    Erum Shaikh has it absolutely correct. The folks who have done this and other folks who have done similar things in the past, they are all going to hell for an eternity. I hope they can make their peace with that ostracization.Recommend

  • Umar Farooq Khawaja

    @Nandita.: In Islam, there is no such thing as lashing for talking to a member of the opposite sex. Also, in Islam, a marriage must be by choice. People have full right to choose whoever they want to marry. Any other interpretation is wrong.Recommend

  • Umar Farooq Khawaja

    @Shah: Talking to a member of the opposite sex is in no way a crime, and certainly not punishable by death. Before you so sanctimoniously support these heinous actions, go have a little read of Islamic jurisprudence. You will realize how absolutely and utterly wrong this action was.Recommend

  • Umar Farooq Khawaja

    @Nandita.: It isn’t as simplistic as that. First, you have to recognize that we all live in a society. Your behaviour is going to affect, inform and influence other people’s behaviour. If people in society, for example, are kind and charitable, most people will try to be like that. If people are unkind and uncharitable, the opposite will occur. This is just how society works. In Islam, sexual activities are limited to married spouses. This is because Allah has commanded us to do so. If you don’t believe in Allah or His commands, by all means, your choice, your body, your problem. I would not tell you what to do, where to go and how to get there.

    On the other hand, a society that has embraced Islam as a whole has the right to expect people to adhere to Islamic law. Islam requires sexual activity to be limited to a husband and a wife and behind closed doors. Do I think there is wisdom in that? Yes. Do I think you share my view. I suspect not. It is, however, our respective right to believe what we want to believe.

    Now having said all this, stoning to death is a punishment where there are 4 eye witnesses to the sexual act. It must be pointed out that these eye witnesses cannot have seen a CCTV footage and conclude that sex took place. No. They must have seen it with their own eyes. Like I said above, you literally have to be doing it in the street for this punishment to become relevant.

    In case you are wondering, Allah insists on sexual activity to be limited to one’s married partners because of children’s rights.Recommend

  • Nobody

    Correction: YOU hate Pakistan and Muslims. Kindly don’t speak for “the world” when it didn’t ask you to. Cheers. Recommend

  • H.

    @The Rebel:
    Because then people might back Islam up for once, rather than slating it. And where’s the fun in that?!!? Also because most people don’t want to know the proper history anyway. It’s a futile exercise. Your words will be falling on deaf ears. They’re happy with the status quo, and/or should I say the so called relly leaders are in a most optimal powerful position for themselves, no way in hell they’d change that for anything. All we can advise people to do is do your own research, read the Hadith, detailed translation of Quran. And stop being led by the nose by weird customs. None of those people in the villages will hear/see any of this as a) they don’t have the facilities and b) no way their village heads will let any sort of enlightenment to happen, lest their position of authority comes into threat. It’s all about power, unfortunately.

    Your comment recommended…Recommend

  • Umar Farooq Khawaja

    @Mj: This is because the slave woman has similar rights to a wife, in the sense that the children born by the woman have rights on the man who fathered them, i.e., the slave owner. In the time of the Prophet (peace by upon him), slavery was rampant and slaves had little or no rights. Slaves were also a valuable commodity. Allah did not command us to release all slaves en masse and He did not abolish slavery. He did however make it extremely difficult for the practice to continue. More importantly though, he gave slaves rights that they did not have before. He gave them the right to agree a fee for their emancipation. He gave them the right to a wage. He made freeing a slave a highly desirable act in terms of the act’s benefits in the hereafter. Part of the rights that slaves got was that if any slave woman bears any children, then those children receive their due rights from the father. So if one looks at the verse you quoted in its entirety, it starts to make sense.

    I have to say that in the past year I struggled with the question of why Allah did not abolish slavery. I have come to the conclusion that it would have been against the rights of the slave owners because they had spent money to buy the slaves in the first place. So Allah chose to strike a balance between the rights of slaves as well as slave owners. He did so by ensuring slaves had rights and a path to freedom if they wanted the freedom. On reflection, I am grateful to say that I think I understand now why Allah did not abolish slavery. Recommend

  • Nobody

    I get what you’re saying dear but you’re preaching to a herd of blind sheep – aimlessly following a shepherd regardless of it’s direction (not ALL people, but some).
    Such people have tunnel vision when it comes to Islamic laws. In Islam, yes pre-marital sex is a crime and no one can change. For those who believe, it was revealed and written and so shall remain. My personal feelings: Islamic laws cannot be aligned with a functioning modern society. That does NOT mean people can’t be as Muslim as they want on a personal level, it simply means the government doesn’t decide what your sexual relationships can be. People hear the NO regarding Islamic laws and start panicking as if I’m dissing the religion itself or saying it shouldn’t exist AT ALL. I’m not. I’m simply stating what I find to be a practical reality. Why do adults need the government to dictate their religion to them? People have a set of personal morals and can live by it. Living in a secular country didn’t mean I couldn’t believe in what I wanted to be it Islam Christianity Hinduism Judaism Buddhism Paganism or Atheism. It simply meant my sexual habits were and are nobody’s business. Be as religious as you want folks. Just don’t take it to another person’s house. Cheers. Recommend

  • Polytheist

    As usual explanations,explanations and more explanations for an cot going back to the stone age!!!Recommend

  • I am a Khan

    @Umar Farooq Khawaja:
    Great Rebuttal to Mj!! Salaam to you brother :) Finally may I add that if you read Chapter 4 (Surah Nisa) verse 25 of the Glorious Quran, it clearly mentions that Bondswomen or Slave women have to be married by a man, for any relations. Hence any relation out of wedlock is totally forbidden. Have a nice day! Recommend

  • Polytheist

    There is no need to study.We see it in actionRecommend

  • Polytheist

    To whom……Only women.Men can have and are not barred from pre marital sex.Only women have to maintain chastityRecommend

  • Sid

    @I am a Khan
    I am not a muslim but have read your scriptures. Right hand possessions are not wives. Sorry really need to study stuff in more detail.

    Mj is spot on when he says: a right hand possession cannot be forced into prostitution. But it does not mean that the right hand possesions have to be married to.

    4:24, and Sahih Hadith in Sunan Abu Dawud also point to the fact that slave women and wives are two different things.

    So CALL A SPADE A SPADE my dear friend and read more.

    Mods please publishRecommend

  • Sid

    @Umar Farooq Khwaja:
    “Allah did not command us to release all slaves en masse and He did not abolish slavery. He did however make it extremely difficult for the practice to continue”

    Why would anyone try to abolish slavery in such a complicated non direct manner.
    Why not command stop slavery from tomorrow. And that should have been that.

    Ponder ponder….

    Mods…critical discussions this with my friends Farooq and Khan…let it continue.Recommend

  • Mj

    @Umar Farooq Khawaja:

    Thank you for putting some thought into your reply, but I am afraid it is a recap of arguments put forward by apologists. When the religion was being introduced, it prohibited many deeply entrenched social customs such as idol worship, female infanticide, intoxicating drinks, and usury, among other things. I’d argue that ban on usury, as a backbone of undeveloped financial system, had deeper and more widespread implications owing to its ban.

    What I don’t understand is that why was slavery not similarly prohibited? The ideology introduced radical changes in society, and slavery may well have been banned as the followers would have accepted eventually were it to be outlawed outright. That however did not happen, and the permission only served to institutionalize slavery. The organized slave trade on a large scale was started by the Arabs after conquest of East and North Africa. North African and Arab Muslims were also the principal culprits in the Atlantic Slave Trade. The first war fought by America was against Berber Muslim states who had enslaved around 2 million Europeans and Americans.

    Saudi Arabia did not outlaw slavery until the mid-1960s, and Mauritania in the mid-1970s. Surely, if the purpose behind permissibility of slavery and concubinage (with a few rights) was a gradual decline of slavery then I am afraid to say it failed miserably.Recommend

  • Sid

    oh common…my response to Khan has a key line….and you’ve removed it. Recommend

  • Sid

    Also @author..there was no religion in stone age…so stone age people must have been more sensible.

    In any case they would have been fending for themselves all the time and trying to feed the young and trying to survive.

    “Back to the stone age” is used when you want to symbolize lack of facilities leading to hadships.

  • Mj

    @I am a Khan:

    Verse 25 talks about slave women who belong to other masters. That is what the compensation refers to. Recommend

  • Voice of Parachinar

    Calling self as a humanist and may be democratic too and same time suggesting to censor my so called nonsense. You are asking to take my liberty away for not telling the truth. What is the difference in between you and rest of Pakistan who pushed us to dark ages.
    RIP on your thinking who consider only English as sane language.Recommend

  • Alishva

    ..I am very that you exactly are aware of what falls in the realms of modesty-in-a-pre-marital-relationship and what doesnt and moreover If you think and agree to it that mating regardless of any marriage is acceptable to you then go your act as you wish but…please refrain from preaching and spreading vulgarity in a society. A woman holds a respect for herself and her body same goes for a man.Recommend

  • I am a Khan

    “Verse 25 talks about slave women who belong to other masters. That is what the compensation refers to.”

    Read the verse properly again and with a good translation- It refers to all Bondswomen. It is clearly commanding men to marry them and they have to be believing bondswomen. Non Believer bondswomen cannot be married nor forced into prostitution. People get confused when they think that sexual relations are allowed with ‘right hand possessions’ without marriage. Verse 25 clearly mentions that for relations to happen, they have to be married. The Glorious Quran needs to be read in context. Different verses complement each other and when all the verses on a particular topic are read, then you get the final Islamic ruling. Cheers. Recommend

  • Faraz Kakar

    The Pathan may shoot the lover of his daughter but he will sing to the glory of love. A strange attitude, you will admit. No stranger than yours when you would hang a thief and admire a merchant. Man has a way of hanging Christ and asking Pilate to dinner. But whenever he wants to sing it is of Christ, not of Pilate. There are no love-songs about the law. No poet has ever dedicated a song to the mother of his ten children.

    Ghani Khan (1948), The PathansRecommend

  • I am a Khan


    I do not mind the comments of @Nandita or @Mj. They are not muslims. But I am really shocked and saddened by your comments, especially if you call yourself to be a muslim.
    Regarding your saying that one should not preach to others. Read the Translation of Surah Asr Chapter 103 of the Quran. “By time, Indeed, Humankind is in loss, Except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds and advised each other to truth and advised each other to patience.”Recommend