Five guys you should not follow on Twitter!
With the advent of Twitter, getting to know people has become much easier. You don’t have to send, approve or delete friendship requests; anyone has the liberty to follow anyone.
However, as tempting as it may be, here’s a list I’ve made of five kinds of guys you should either never follow on Twitter, or follow at your own risk!
1. The ‘every girl is beautiful’ guy:
This guy’s bio and picture will tell you all you need to know about him. He thinks you’re beautiful. He would date you if he knew you. He has devoted his life to making women smile. Thus he has thousands of devoted female followers, who have obviously gained confidence because this seemingly attractive young man has put up a picture in which he holds a placard with ‘You’re Beautiful’ scribbled on it.
Being the kind guy that he is, he will usually take time out of his very busy schedule and ask his adoring female fans to ask him questions to which he will graciously reply.
It will be tough not to press that follow button, ladies, but if you do, it’ll only lead to unrequited love.
2. The pious guy:
This guy will usually hail from a Western country. He has got ‘swag’ but, please, do not be deceived. He is very religious. He tweets about piety, love and forgiveness along with the occasional tweet about how he’s so amazing and needs the love of a good woman to complete him.
He goes in overdrive during Ramazan telling everyone how he’s been praying and how they should follow suit. This guy also (surprise surprise!) has a lot of devoted female followers. Seems like girls today are starved for religious guys who also look like rappers. He will tell you how relationships are ‘haraam’ but that does not stop him from flirting with his female followers.
Oh, the sacrifices he makes.
3. The self-proclaimed celebrity:
Don’t be deceived by his bio. He really has nothing credible to his name, except maybe a few videos on YouTube of his idea of humour or of him belting out a song in the most audibly and visually disturbing of ways.
Yet again, you will see hordes of girls vying for this young man’s attention, convinced that he’s the next big thing since sliced bread!
4. The guy who takes himself too seriously:
Twitter is filled with these guys. In their eyes, no one is more original or can have such a radical opinion as them. They have an opinion about everything, from your mum’s biryani to the credibility of the state.
They will butt into your tweets because they feel it’s their public obligation to correct everyone’s opinions to mirror their own, obviously far superior ones.
5. The ‘frandshipper’:
This guy takes plain old ‘frandshipping’ to a whole new level! He will tweet to you and replying to him will be one of the biggest mistakes of your life, because, clearly, now he knows you’ve fallen for him. He knows his tweets were just right to make your heart melt and you replying only confirms it.
Now he will direct message you till he either gets the message that you’re ignoring him or till you block him.
Don’t be too hard on him, poor guy has just confused Twitter with ShaadiOnline.com.
Follow Rameeza on Twitter @Rameezay
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The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of The Express Tribune.