The key to happiness: Stand your ground

Published: March 8, 2012

The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved, even if it’s ‘just’ by ourselves.

Whoever told me, happiness just magically comes your way, should’ve been tripped headfirst. Because it really doesn’t sneak up on you, it doesn’t tickle your toes and makes its way into your heart and head. Happiness is a 24/7 job, and a tough one at that. It’s a time-consuming process. A tantrum throwing toddler that constantly seeks your attention.

Call ethereal happiness a self-created sand castle on your personal shore. Every now and then waves of grief and anger will constantly wash over it, and more often than not, strong winds of disappointment will topple it over, but you’ve got to keep yourself on your toes, prepared and anxious to build it over and over again. Even when you’re cold and hungry, alone and lost, or bit by a morbid jellyfish, you’ve got to stand your ground, give it one last pat of finality before letting it all fall down again.

And fall down it will. Even if it’s cemented and glued, taped and walled. It’s still bound to fall again and again and again and again and again. But you can’t keep yourself fixated over the fall. Because if your castle doesn’t fall apart every now and then, there will be nothing to work for, nothing to build, nothing to look forward to, nothing to prove and nothing to lose. And without the painful fall or loss, would the final product feel worth it?

And in this constant struggle, it helps if you’ve got someone on the sidelines who honestly believes in your ability to keep at this very irritating task. But more times than not, there will be no one to cheer for you or catch you when it staggers to the ground. And in those times, it is absolutely essential to be your own cheerleader, your own believer, your own friend.

At the end of the day, the supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved, even if it’s ‘just’ by ourselves.

Saba Khalid

Saba Khalid

A blogger for Rolling Stone magazine, a contributor to Kulturaustauch and Musikexpres, Saba is an Institute for Foreign Affairs (IFA) Cross Culture scholar for the year 2012 who also teaches creative writing to young aspiring writers. She blogs at and can be found on instagram as @thecityalive

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