Sakina Hassan

Sakina Hassan

The author is currently studying for an Mphil degree at the Centre of Excellence in Solid State Physics.

Nawaz Sharif going once.. going twice!

Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif was recently put on sale on eBay by one frustrated Pakistani who was sick of all the nuisances cluttering up his life. The move was applauded by many world over but mostly in Pakistan, and it occurred to me that this ‘spring-cleaning’ of our country should continue well beyond the realm of prime ministers that have time and again failed to deliver. Here are ‘for sale’ advertisements for other aspects of Pakistan: 1. The judiciary Sindh High CourtPhoto: Online The corrupt judiciary is only good for long marches and works with a special starter key of either monetary or political clout. ...

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An Army Public School massacre game? Really Punjab IT board?

Someone decided to make a first person shooting game about the Army Public School (APS) massacre. No, no, I’m not joking. I swear, it’s true. It’s no longer available on Google Play store (Gosh! I wonder why?) but people have seen it, played it, reviewed it and are all asking the same question, what were you thinking Punjab IT Board? The answer is, probably nothing. A video game of APS school attack? WTF is the Punjab IT Board smoking? Are they out of their freaking minds? — Sahrish Iftikhar (@shadesofsunrise) January 18, 2016 Some great premises for the Punjab IT Board to mine for ...

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The honeytrap and the (gullible) Indian Air Force

I recently heard about the honeytrap that was used to extract sensitive Intel from members of the Indian military. When I was finally able to stop laughing, I began to wonder why this hadn’t been bigger news on this side of the border because all Google searches on the subject result in Indian sources. Okay so today I learnt about the 'ISI honeytrap' Been laughing for 3 hours straight — HereBeDragons (@rageandpencils) January 6, 2016 ISI Used Fake Facebook ID To Honeytrap IAF Airman & Got Confidential Information yeh toh lol hogya…. — Junaid Shah (@junaidshah492) January 2, 2016 No guns, violence, and pigeons needed ;) #ProudPakistaniMoments #ISI https://t.co/LX5iKktDPh — ...

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Who would win the ultimate dance-off between Shoaib and Yuvraj?

An event of momentous importance has occurred and, as is usual with the more earth shaking happenings, has been completely ignored. One might suspect a cover-up by the intelligence agencies because why, for the love of all that is holy, is no one talking about this? Shoaib Malik has challenged Yuvraj Singh to a dance-off. @YUVSTRONG12 @MirzaSania ajjao maydaan may This is how it is done! @realshoaibmalik Bhai hum tho hamesha maidan mein the @Velfieapp pic.twitter.com/uYqTVXbcWz — yuvraj singh (@YUVSTRONG12) July 25, 2015 Ladies and gentlemen, the gauntlet has been thrown. The reputation of our country is at stake. Two cricket legends (and-a-tennis-player-meh-nobody-cares) face off on ...

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Are we really going to blame India for the heatwave?

The recent heat wave in Karachi that has claimed over a thousand lives is one more nail in our government’s coffin of negligence and its inability to deal with a crisis. It has also become the norm in the subcontinent to give public officials the opportunity to show just how mind-numbingly dumb they really are. In a recent statement, the Minister for Climate Change Senator Mushahidullah Khan has said that the actual responsibility for the heat wave lies with the boogie across the border, India. He claims that coal-powered plants in Rajasthan, India could have contributed to the heat wave. The senator does not quote any scientific research to support his claim, ...

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No BJP, Rahul Gandhi did not cause the earthquake in Nepal

A devastating earthquake clocking in a shocking 7.8 on the Richter scale rocked Nepal on Saturday, killing nearly 4,000 people and injuring 6,000. As aid and prayers rush towards the afflicted from all over the world, measurements are being taken and reports drafted about aftershocks and future quakes that might occur in the region. Science has come far in the last couple of centuries but man is still, in the grand scale of things, no more than an amoeba, crawling on the surface of a soft-boiled egg still warm out of the pan. Not everyone was upset, however. Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) functionaries Sakshi Maharaj and Sadhvi Prachi insisted that the earthquake ...

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Petrol shortages: Please don’t blame the government…

After a long and relatively blissful slump in the price of petrol, it was increased by Rs4 in the beginning of the month of April, much to the dismay of the public. This is the beginning of the end of long drives and unnecessary trips to anywhere. The reasons cited are as varied as the different kinds of Shan Biryani Masalas you get in the market (I am not getting paid for this, it only counts towards ‘interest in the kitchen’ points with my mom). They range from ‘rising oil prices worldwide’ to an ‘intricate Saudi conspiracy that will alter the very fabric of ...

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Who needs Armani and Gucci when you have Modi?

The Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi claims that his fashion sense is God’s gift to him, given probably because most of the nicer gifts (gifts that he might have actually used to run a country) had already been given away. It’s heartening to hear that absurdities in political spheres are not limited to this side of the border, and that the Indian public is treated to exactly the same kind of drivel as we are. Photo: Reuters Of course such comments must be a breath of fresh air after the usual slew of opinions that Indian politicians tend ...

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One small step for Sheikh al-Khaibari, one giant leap for mankind

Once upon a time, far away, long ago… These are the words with which I was tempted to begin today, before I was told off by a friend for being overly cynical and unable to look at the bright side, the silver lining, the beautiful butterflies that the caterpillars currently infesting my lemon trees will one day become, etcetera. For her sake, I will take optimism by the hand today and see how far the yellow brick road goes. My quest today is to make sense of the latest in absurdity that the glorious Kingdom Of Saudi Arabia has to offer. For ...

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For singles: How to survive Valentine’s Day

You there! That’s right, you with premature wrinkles around your mouth! You’ve been cringing at couples, haven’t you? So does the colour pink make you vomit? Does the shape of a heart send you into throes of an epileptic fit? Do you just hate teddy bears? It’s okay. Just breathe, we have you covered. You are single, my dear and there is nothing wrong with that. You’ve managed perfectly well all on your own all through cuddle December and shaadi season January but now comes the ultimate test. Valentine’s day is just around the corner and everywhere you turn you see ...

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