The day I wore a niqab
Books have been written about it, feminists have insulted it, Muslim feminists, however, have defended it, and international laws are being passed against it. While there are some extreme cases where women are forced to wear a niqab (veil), most of the niqab-wearing women I know in Toronto and Karachi wear it due to a personal choice. I have some experience with the performing arts and expression, whereby one uses the body and it’s form as a canvas to initiate reaction and to enable visual dialogue between the performance artist and the viewer. Therefore, as a social and creative experiment, I decided to ...
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Durr-e-Shahwar: Television blames working women
Last Saturday night, I sat down with my mother-in-law to watch a new television drama serial named “Durr-e-Shahwar” which has come after the much talked and blogged about “Humsafar”. She was quite eager to watch this new serial, and I decided to keep her company. However, a few minutes into the show I started feeling anger at the writer and producer. Here’s why: “Durr-e-Shahwar” portrayed a working woman who was so focused on her career that she ignored everybody around her – her family, her husband and her in-laws. While the show is well-produced and ...
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The dilemmas of a Muslim shopper
Over the past couple of weeks my sister was in town,and along with my mother, we spent a good deal of time in shopping malls, taking advantage of discounts during a seasonal sale. Having lost a few pounds in the past couple of months, and after starting a new job in December, I had no qualms about treating myself to some new clothes, shoes, and accessories. Like many women, I find buying new items quite gratifying. This is especially so because in the past two to three years, I managed to work towards having financial freedom for the first time. ...
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Baby scare: Motherhood can change your life
On December 2, 2010 I called my obstetrician/gynaecologist’s office only to hear the words: “Ma’am, you are seven weeks pregnant!” I couldn’t believe my ears. What the nurse told me seemed impossible. I immediately logged on to Googletalk and broke the news to my husband. He wanted to share the news with his family members, but I was still in a state of disbelief and stopped him from spreading the word. I spent that entire day crying, wrapped under a blanket, until my husband came home. After a few days, he started sharing the ‘good news’ and simultaneously, I started receiving ‘congratulation’ ...
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The tough New Yorkers of Lahore
I moved to Lahore from my home town of Faisalabad, to pursue higher education at the Government College University. Although I didn’t know it then, Lahore was to be my home for a very long time. My MBA years flew by when I lived in the university hostel. My needs were simple; I wanted nothing more than the 15 x 15 cubicle that I shared with a room-mate. There were no air-conditioners in the summer, no heaters in the winter, no maids to do my laundry, and no home-cooked food. Yet, I survived. Even though the winters were bitterly cold in Lahore, my room was ...
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Domestic violence: The scars that remain
I had met Sumaira Waseem* many times for work. Vivacious, smiling, in control – she seemed to be a confident, educated woman who had it all: a home, a comfortable lifestyle, three children, a ‘nice guy’ husband and a career she enjoyed as an HR consultant. But sometimes, just sometimes, I felt her eyes did not smile along with her lips. Over the years, slowly, we developed a friendship. This year, during one of our heart-to-hearts, Sumaira spoke out. She came out of her closet. What I heard stunned me. Waseem and she seemed like the almost perfect couple. He was quiet, ...
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Help! I’m a ‘handsome’ girl
Dear Miss Informed, I have a serious issue. I am a working woman. I go to work bright and early at 8am and don’t come back before 7:30 in the evening. For this reason, I find that I never have time to visit the salon; this means bushy eyebrows, chipped nails, frizzy hair and a pubescent moustache. By the time I’m done from work, every single beauty parlour in the city has closed for the day, which means that I look “handsome” till Sunday (my day off) to go and get de-haired and look pretty. I don’t mean to sound like a ...
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The real women who will change Pakistan
Three women from diverse backgrounds and facing multiple challenges all seem to have one priority – education. I met Mussarat a few years ago. After losing her husband to a protracted illness, Mussarat brought up and educated her two daughters alone.She worked in a tube-light making factory, a sewing and stitching centre and also cleaned people’s homes- sometimes holding more than one job,simultaneously. She had been dependent on her father for her livelihood before marriage and her husband after her marriage. Uneducated and unskilled, she was left to fend for herself when her husband was no longer able to provide ...
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Money 101: All women need a job
Happy Women’s Day everyone! I am amazed at how the Pakistani woman has evolved in the last 20 years. Away from the land of saas bahu TV shows, she is well aware of her rights and will not be intimidated by male co-workers. In fact, she is most likely to outperform them and get that promotion! Our mothers fought for options – so that we could choose between staying at home or going out to work. But I feel that it is compulsory for every woman to have some form of part-time, flexible hours work, even if it is not the 9 to ...
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Selling Faiz to the rich for Rs1,000
Lahore’s mall road was as crowded as always. Beyond the zooming vehicles and amongst the old silent trees, I saw him walking slowly on a footpath. There was something dramatic about the old man’s appearance. He reminded me of realist Soviet paintings; ragged dusty clothes, long gray hair, wrinkled face and clutching a small piece of scarlet, a little red flag. He was heading towards the Alhamra Art Complex which was covered with life sized posters of the legendary socialist poet Faiz Ahmed Faiz. The poet’s centenary celebrations were about to begin and the parking lot was almost full. The old man stood ...
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