A ‘beta’ for Bruni
Life in the upper echelons of European society can sometimes be as gender biased as it is on our side of the globe. On the one hand, there are Drottningholm Palace of Sweden, that has followed equal primogeniture in their law of succession since 1980, and the Buckingham Palace that plans to do the same to enable William and Kate’s firstborn boy or girl to succeed to the throne after the future King William. On the other hand, there’s Èlysée Palace, home to President Sarkozy of the Republic of France, where (as reports suggest) the First Lady, Ms Carla ...
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Pakistan hates women
Pardon me for being so blunt, but I’m not wrong. When you live in a country in which 80 per cent of the women are subjected to domestic abuse, then one can do nothing but point his or her finger at the collective psyche of the nation, within which misogynist ideas are so profoundly ingrained. There’s nothing wrong with particular individuals but something is terribly awry with us as a whole. If there’s one thing Mukhtaran Mai’s struggle has taught us, it is that this nation abhors rape victims more than it despises rapists. Our society, in lieu of teaching ...
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VS Naipaul: Proud and prejudicial
“It is the best for all tame animals to be ruled by human beings. For this is how they are kept alive. In the same way, the relationship between the male and the female is by nature such that the male is higher, the female lower, that the male rules and the female is ruled.” This is what Aristotle said hundreds of years ago. It is a less than comforting thought that man has only evolved so much in the years following Aristotle. I say this after reading VS Naipaul’s latest attention seeking rant in Amy Fallon’s report in The Guardian. ...
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Transgender: Of sense and sexuality
I talk about AIDS, sex and sexuality. Don’t look at me that way. I, too, belong to a religious conservative family. No, I am not a non-believer. No, I do not have AIDS. Yes, I am a woman. Yes, I have morals. This issue has been taboo, cursed and frowned upon. It has been buried so deep, that it is almost impossible to even think about talking of. But I do. I conduct and facilitate workshops on HIV/AIDS awareness. ————— This is the story of two people I met a couple of weeks ago. They both liked boys. They were both shy, and could not speak at ...
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Port Grand, saying no to men
Five years in the making, Port Grand finally opened its doors last month bringing hope of some entertainment to Karachiites. Work on the much talked about project began in 2006. I for one had been waiting for it to open impatiently. The management promised a much earlier opening date but delays and lack of funds meant that it took almost twice the time to complete the project, and when the day finally came, I couldn’t wait to check the place out. My favourite RJs on the radio wouldn’t stop talking about it the day after it opened. I visited Port Grand’s website and ...
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Male feminist: The day I learnt the meaning of ‘anti-climax’
I was hooked on to him ever since I read his profile. The ‘about me’ section proclaimed,”I am a male feminist.” That sentence blew my mind. This was the guy I had been looking for high and low, and had given up all hope of finding. It was high time I found someone. All my friends had successfully found (read: lured) wealthy, eligible and (kind of) cute bachelors. I felt like an outcast in their discussions which went on sometime like this: “What shade of lipstick should I wear with my new black suit?” “You know what? My guy gave me this imported ...
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Money 101: All women need a job
Happy Women’s Day everyone! I am amazed at how the Pakistani woman has evolved in the last 20 years. Away from the land of saas bahu TV shows, she is well aware of her rights and will not be intimidated by male co-workers. In fact, she is most likely to outperform them and get that promotion! Our mothers fought for options – so that we could choose between staying at home or going out to work. But I feel that it is compulsory for every woman to have some form of part-time, flexible hours work, even if it is not the 9 to ...
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After recovery: Who wants a woman like you?
This week I visited the Punjab Institute of Mental Health (PIMH) in the Shadman area of Lahore with my class. We noticed a stark difference between the men’s ward and the women’s ward. It was a heartbreaking experience. I came to realize that the stigma of being a “mental patient” can mean loneliness and isolation for all psychiatric patients, especially women. The men’s ward When we entered the men’s ward we saw a group of men clad in bright blue shalwar kameez and mismatched sweaters. They were seated on rough carpets on the floor, basking in the warmth of the winter sun. These were the stable ...
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Men love to hate women drivers
When I learned to ride a bicycle I was told to be aware of kids playing in the street or the roadside, old men on bikes and cars with female drivers. There is certain logic behind the three precautions and after almost seven years, I still follow these rules on the road. Yesterday, the topic of women drivers popped up, while some of my friends and I were having a chat. I do not know why but we men really enjoy talking about accidents or mishaps that take place on the roads because of female drivers. For the first time ...
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