Teahouse conversations
One of the perils of working for a newspaper is that whoever you meet, feels entitled to discuss the state of affairs with you. They must tell you that these are the worst of times, that the current government is the most corrupt ever (citing some ballpark figures and rupee-dollar conversion rate as irrefutable evidence), that there are maps of a dismembered Pakistan circulating on the internet, and that the Chief Justice was an “epic fail” because he ran back to Islamabad instead of delivering a verdict on the Karachi suo motu case. They would then heave a deep sigh, condemn ...
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No gay girl in Syria: Lessons for the social media community
The mysterious “Gay Girl in Damascus,” who had been kidnapped, was recently revealed to be a hoax – not just a deception. The case has also been a great disappointment for blog readers and followers. It turned out that the blog was not written by a gay girl in Damascus, but a 40-year-old American man, who is currently on vacation with his wife in Turkey. The pictures used on the web page belonged to a woman in London, who had nothing to do with the blog at all. The news comes as a shock to the many who campaigned for Amina since ...
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Your daughter did not get in to KGS
A few weeks ago, a friend of mine called me on the phone. He sounded extremely excited, “My daughter got into Karachi Grammar School!” I was surprised as the KGS office wasn’t supposed to announce results until April 29. Curious, I decided to investigate. “Which grade?” I asked. “Nursery,” was the reply. “Who took the interview?” “Oh, we were not interviewed at all.” My friend explained that a distant relative had given him a registration form and he had taken his daughter for an admission test to the Marriot – where they were offered admission on the spot. “There were close to 20 other applicants,” my friend told ...
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Pirs, fakirs and other freaks
Blood curdling fury. That’s the best and perhaps only way to describe my feelings when I read news stories about pirs and their never-ending shenanigans. Fury, not at the pirs, because let’s face it, they’ve proved time and again that they’re quite good at their job of scamming, but at the people who happily volunteer to be used and abused by these charlatans and then go whining about their misfortune to the authorities, seeking commiseration and justice. What a heartless snoot you must think I am, right? Brutally chalking off victims of one of the most hideous and widespread forms of ...
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The perfect rishta can be expensive
Finding a proper match these days has become an onerous task. People mostly rely on ‘marriage wali’ aunties who keep on advertising in different newspapers. Most of the marriage bureaus operating in Pakistan are fake. They post ads in newspapers, ask families to fill out registration forms, take a large amount of money and never send a single family. They don’t even bother to pick up your phone when you call them after you have paid their fee. Quit playing games Some of my friends have had bad experiences with S Assoc. and Mrs K in Islamabad. S Assoc. ask families to ...
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University of Panjab – anyone?
Some of our parliamentarians are being questioned on the authenticity of their academic degrees. How disgraceful that we have sitting lawmakers, most of whom might turn out to be complete frauds. Quite a few have master’s and bachelors’ degrees from an institution by the name of ‘University of Panjab’. Next thing we know, the rest will be from ‘Harward’ or ‘Priceton’. In that case, the majority of them will be qualified enough only to be disqualified. The Higher Education Commission has said that it will need three months to verify degrees of lawmakers from PPP, PML-Q and PML-N. The ...
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